Honestly, NOBODY wants to know “how to be delta male”! And it’s not just because delta males are way down in the social hierarchy. It’s also because he has way more negative traits than the superior men.
However, it’s not like they are complete dunces either… they too have good qualities. They can have a much more fulfilling life because of their personality.
And if you wanna be like a delta male, my think-piece is perfect to embrace their positive traits.
So, c’mon, let’s get down to work!
How to Be Delta Male?
Though being a delta male isn’t that desirable, I’m certain you know what you want. A delta male is average but he’s known for being a romantic person and he’s also a great lover.
A delta male personality allows you to be unapologetically you. So, if you want to reap the benefits of this personality type, just dig in!
1. Stay away from the daily bustle
A delta male is shy and introverted and he always likes to spend his time in solitude.
Okay, so you’re a hard-core extrovert?
Don’t worry, I won’t ask you to change yourself completely because your extroversion helps you in numerous ways.
Instead of becoming a complete homebody, focus on minimizing how much you go out. If you go out 3 days a week, bring it down to 2.
Or, go out but sometimes indulge in peaceful areas. Suppose you enjoy karaoke, concerts, clubbing, and other loud entertainment. Indulge in quiet activities like cooking, movies, archery, or even visit zoos.
Incorporate more peaceful activities and feel the change within.
2. Even if you can’t avoid them, take space!
Let’s say you can’t avoid going out daily to loud places. Perhaps, you like it, or it’s the only way to spend quality time with your loved ones… I understand it, and I won’t make you do anything against your desires!
In this situation, enjoy your routine but take 20 minutes out of it. Don’t party until 4 am in the morning. Make sure you set out from your party venue so that you can have 10-20 minutes of self-care sessions at home.
Suppose you’re out on a vacation and everyone is together. Retire to bed a bit early even if the rest don’t. Take your time to meditate, clean and moisturize your skin, pamper yourself, and get to bed.
Try either the previous or this step, and you’ll always feel refreshed the next morning.
3. Think more than you express
Delta men are people pleasers, so they don’t feel comfortable sharing their thoughts. They are wary of conflicts and confrontations.
But it’s okay if you’re outspoken! I won’t make you accept a poor trait.
However, take your time to think before you speak. Don’t talk less or hide your opinions, but take a moment to truly listen to others.
Don’t jump to conclusions too soon, and play out a scenario in your mind. What will happen if you express yourself? Will they be offended? Do you want to offend them? Or do you want to avoid saying hurtful things impulsively?
Have a conversation with yourself mentally, you’ll thank me later!
4. Say NO to oversharing
If you’re extroverted, you probably can’t keep any thoughts inside. You express everything that goes on in your mind and life, despite who’s your company.
But is that safe? Is your companion a well-wisher?
Unless you get solid proof of that, never share anything that can be used against you. Even if that person is your girlfriend of 2 weeks, tone it down. Let the relationship mature, you’ll know whether you can trust her or not.
Even if it’s your uncle or a cousin, be more cautious. Everyone is competitive, and people can even betray blood for their benefit. So, stop sharing your secrets and vulnerabilities and observe more.
5. If you don’t want, don’t lead
Again, this isn’t a great trait when you observe delta males. It portrays their insecurities and self-doubt about themselves. But you can still use it positively, and here’s how:
Suppose you’re selected as a team leader in academics or professional life but you’re not excited to do that. You have some personal issues going on, and you can’t devote yourself completely to your duties as a leader.
Don’t feel obliged to accept the responsibility. You might feel bad about turning them down but you must prioritize yourself during crises.
Of course, if you want to lead, are confident, and can handle the responsibilities, then don’t consider this point!
6. Be a diehard romantic for your girl
Delta males are known to be hopeless romantics but that course isn’t always healthy. However, you can be a diehard romantic to be in a comparable position. Here are a few ways to be one:
- Gaze into her eyes when you say “I love you”.
- Be eager to try her suggestions and believe in her (unless that violates your boundaries).
- Get her old-school gifts like roses, chocolates, hand-written cards, or anything meaningful on special days.
- On dates, wear outfits she chose for you or likes to see you in.
- If your date night is canceled, switch the stereo on, and sway your bodies to slow music.
Just do anything that makes her heart skip a beat!
7. Let your girl take charge, only if she likes!
Delta males are known to be submissive in relationships (not in bed 😉). Since they consistently act this way, their partners get bored soon. However, if you do it in moderation, she’ll crave you the most!
Well, if your partner wants to take charge in the relationship or wants to boss you around once in a while, let her. Of course, I won’t ask you to become her slave or comply with anything she demands.
Rather, play along when she acts like a baby. Or, if she made plans, let her lead.
But if she wants you to take charge, confidently add spontaneity and take care of your responsibilities.
8. If you want revenge, serve it cold!
If you believe in forgiveness or think that not forgiving upsets you, suit yourself. I’m nobody to change your morals and beliefs. However, if you’re the type who likes revenge more than justice, then do it the right way… the delta way!
To make your revenge juicier, don’t let your offender know that you’re planning one. Let them think you’re okay with everything. You can also take up months or years until the perfect time appears. And strike them when they are the most vulnerable!
But first, ask yourself who’s truly responsible for the mess. If they are innocent, don’t even try to get revenge… otherwise, karma will strike you too hard.
Furthermore, don’t try to get revenge on your loved ones unless they betray you.
9. If you’re a nerd, don’t be ashamed
This step is only if you are a geek. If you’re not, skip this one.
Being a geek, you love to spend time reading science fiction, understanding technology from YouTube spirals, studying complicated subjects, and playing games.
However, if you suppress your desires and indulge more in non-geeky activities, stop!
Sure, you must balance your life and not focus on your geeky interests only. You must also spend time with your loved ones.
But when you spend alone time, don’t think about others’ opinions. Society will always call you names, so don’t deny yourself basic pleasure. Instead, do what your heart wants.
10. Be your loved ones’ cheerleader
If your friends or family want to start a new phase of their life, be supportive like a delta male. If a close one had a bad day, help them cheer up. Be faithful to your lover and remind him/her that you’ll always back them.
If any loved one cries but doesn’t share what happened, don’t force them. But don’t ignore them either… and lend them a shoulder instead.
If they doubt themselves, remind them of their good qualities. Observe your loved ones and their attitude. Step up if something seems wrong. Be a truly empathetic person from within.
11. Stay true to your professional duties
In your professional life, you might aim for a better position in the organization or are already in a stable position and don’t wish to risk any further. That’s completely your choice and nobody has a say in it!
However, make sure that you take care of your current responsibilities truthfully. If you don’t want to progress anymore, don’t overachieve. Don’t work overtime or take extra responsibilities… but AT LEAST undertake your existing duties flawlessly.
Otherwise, your employer won’t see any value in you and won’t need you in the organization. So, make yourself an invaluable asset even if you’re just around entry-level. Don’t forget that the workers at the base are the most precious.
12. Be proud of your professional standing
Often, society judges people based on their social status and professional designation. Most of us are brought up in families where they label worth based on our job and designation… even more than our happiness and income.
So, you might feel insecure about not having a great designation or popular career choice. However, to be a true delta, get over this unjustified shame.
If you’re truly content with your job, that’s the greatest thing to ask for in your professional life. If you can provide the basic needs, support your family, and give them a good enough life (not a luxurious life), only that matters.
Next time, if anyone in your personal, professional, or social life throws mean words, ignore them!
13. Don’t be an alpha’s bootlicker
Most people try to curry favors from powerful people. For instance, some become the teacher’s pet, while some lick their boss’ boots. They expect to be treated differently for acting like a slave.
Even if they get extra favors, don’t ever try the same. Respect a powerful person if they do their job properly. People above you are supposed to be representatives, protectors, and providers.
If they can’t undertake these duties properly yet enjoy the benefits and power of their status, call them out.
Of course, don’t be reckless, and make sure your identity is anonymous.
14. Never take your boss’ disrespect
To be a delta male, the bare minimum is to protect yourself and let nobody disrespect you. In the social hierarchy, delta males are just in the middle, yet some people make a big deal out of it. They aren’t even treated well for their choices.
Especially in the workplace, if anyone treats you or people in your designation like dirt, show them your power. If all of you leave an organization together, that’s bound to crumble.
The Average Joe is much more powerful because there are too many of them.
Don’t let them decide something in their favor but not in yours. Even if they do, show them that you’re precious.
15. Play as hard as you work
While you work, you’re 100% dedicated to your duties. Clock in at the right time, make sure you complete all the tasks for the day within the set time and clock out at the exact time. Don’t let any thoughts distract your job.
Similarly, when you’re off work, don’t respond to work calls or emails unless it’s an emergency. Have a healthy work-life balance. Never let work interfere with your personal life. Remember, you work to live and not vice versa.
Whether you’re just sleeping, spending time with loved ones, or just playing online games… don’t be obliged to answer that. You have the right to not share your personal life matters at work.
16. Embrace self-awareness
Be mindful of all of your actions in your personal, professional, and social life. Especially if you want to avoid following the mass, know your actions and the short and long-term consequences.
Often, delta males listen “You’re not taking that promotion… you don’t even know what you’re missing”. But, they know exactly what they want in their life and choose what suits their needs the best.
So, before you make any sort of decision in any area of your life, understand and be aware of your feelings.
Why do you want to do something? Will it help you? Do you think the other route will hurt you?
Answer honestly and choose wisely. Don’t let others’ thoughts shake you up.
17. Be assertive without aggression
When you’re confident about something, stick to your choice. Lay out your boundaries and don’t compromise despite others’ opinions. Don’t let others change your mind if you’re aware you’re right.
Once you’re self-aware, you can be more assertive about your choices. However, don’t let your emotions overflow, and calmly tackle any situation. Aggression won’t make the situation better but will ignite a poor fight.
Instead, staying calm and steady will show others that you have more power than them.
18. Only chase compatible women
Women have always desired powerful and capable men. But most of the world is monogamous right now… so, all women can’t aim for alpha, beta, or sigma males. There aren’t enough top-notch men out there.
So, to have a satisfying relationship, always aim for a woman of the same or lower hierarchy. If you transition into a delta successfully, go for delta, gamma, or omega women.
The rule stands the same depending on your actual social status. If you’re a gamma male, in reality, don’t hit on a delta female.
If you still seek some high-value woman of better hierarchy, she’ll eventually get bored of you. Even if you invest your emotions, she’ll seek someone better eventually.
Note: this doesn’t stand for all women, but don’t gamble on that possibility.
19. Seek women with friendship
When you want to hit on a potential romantic partner, don’t ask them out randomly. Instead, try to be friends first!
Delta males use this method just to play safe and avoid getting rejected too early. They take their time to show their good traits and convince their crush about dating them.
But I personally feel friendship is the foundation of any healthy romantic relationship. So, if you seek her without any pressure of dating, flaunt your value, and let her judge, she’ll anticipate the moment when you’ll ask her out.
20. Boost your emotional intelligence
Try to understand not only your own emotions and feelings. But also work on your perception of others’ emotions.
While communicating, listen to what others say and try to understand them. Don’t try to retort with answers or solutions for someone’s problems. Perhaps, they only want you to listen and be there for them.
When you understand what might hurt others, you can also avoid hurting others unknowingly. You’ll also cherish your bonds better in the long run.
A word from ThePleasantPersonality
Changing your personality type or embracing new traits isn’t easy. So, don’t expect results too fast, and keep practicing regularly.
It won’t be an easy path, so focus and don’t be discouraged by the minute troubles. Be true to yourself throughout the journey. I’m sure you’ll succeed in your goals!
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...