Wondering how to be sigma male? Think that this badass lone wolf is so cool that you also wanna be one?
It’s great that you have a set goal in your mind. Though changing your personality isn’t easy, this think-piece will definitely help you in this quest.
So, let’s plunge together!
How to Be Sigma Male?
A sigma male is so much like an alpha without toxic dominating traits. He also doesn’t let society order him around. It’s normal to desire to be one… after all, you can’t go wrong when you adopt only the positive traits. So, let’s begin the quest!
1. Be unapologetically you
Right now, you are your best version. You have no reason to feel insecure or doubtful about yourself. You have every reason to be proud of yourself, so be confident about yourself.
If you usually act differently in your social circles, it’s time to stop that. Be comfortable in your own skin because sigma males don’t change their behavior whether they are at home or outside.
Whether you’re a student, working adult, or a homemaker, don’t care about who’s around you and let your enigmatic self out.
2. Create your own rules
Society has made millions of rules forever and there’s no end to it. You can’t ever satisfy them by following their rules. They’ll eventually find something to complain about you. So, it’s high time to lead your life your way.
A sigma male doesn’t let society confine them to nonsensical rules. So, don’t try to fit in and stop conforming to society. Instead, think about your personal morals and ethics.
You might not like this idea because if you don’t please others, you might lose some people from your social groups. But it all works out in your favor because a sigma male doesn’t keep fake friends around.
3. Don’t be arrogant or aggressive
Stop pleasing others mindlessly, but it’s not okay to act arrogantly to others. Like a sigma male, be humble even when you show your strength. Convey that you won’t follow others’ lead, but don’t be overconfident about your powers. Make sure you don’t look down on others.
Moreover, if anyone tries to hurt you, don’t be aggressive. Avoid letting your emotions get the better of you. Instead, take a few breaths to cool yourself. After calming down, communicate with them without showing any emotion. Tear them off with your calm words instead.
4. Be a compassionate leader
Sigma men don’t want others’ responsibilities and avoid anything that requires them to mind others. So, you can also avoid being in charge of others.
However, once others notice their distinct leadership skills, they don’t let them alone. So, even if you avoid leading, be prepared for unavoidable times. As a leader, never be authoritative, dominant, or bossy. Instead, be understanding, respectful, and compassionate toward your team members.
Motivate others silently and teach them your ways with examples. Never ask them to be a particular way just because you want it. Instead, show them what method works better and what doesn’t practically. Treat them like a friend but don’t forget to be confident or you’ll give away beta male vibes.
5. Be open to compromise
At times, you might face tricky life situations. You can’t help but try to adjust to the situation because you don’t have an option. If you don’t have any control over it, it’s better to not fight it.
Neither get agitated or anxious during these moments nor seek ways to oppose it. Instead, let the truth sink and accept the issue. Then think about ways to reach a middle ground.
If the situation includes another person, embrace the differences. Talk together to make a deal where neither of you loses too much.
6. But compromise only when you benefit
Though compromising is important, make sure that you benefit from it.
Suppose you and your team members had different yet equally good ideas. If only either of your choices is prioritized, the other will be disappointed. Their low mood also affects the entire group. In this situation, compromise helps you reach your goals and keep the team spirit high.
However, if the other person’s ideas aren’t that great, compromising won’t help you reach your goals. Rather, it’ll affect your performance. During these moments, stick to your plan and ignore them.
7. Learn to talk less and spend more time in silence
Men with sigma male personality traits are like introverted alpha males. If you’re an outgoing person, you can’t become introverted overnight.
In fact, try to be your genuine self as much as you can, so don’t even try to do something like that. Know that you’re the best even if you’re outspoken.
However, during conversations, try to talk less. This will help you keep your secrets to yourself. When you talk a lot, you let your vulnerabilities show. So, while socializing, reduce the amount of info you give away. You’ll also seem mysterious and more attractive this way.
8. Adapt listening skills
While you learn to talk and share less about yourself, you’ll eventually learn listening skills. So, don’t take the last step lightly. When you stay silent during convos, you’ll know the importance of empathetic listening.
Don’t interrupt others when they talk. Don’t try to one-up them when they mention their difficulties. They’ll feel heard and respected because you listen to them with utmost interest.
Especially in your personal relationships, your loved ones will know that you care for them. They’ll feel comfortable letting it all out in your presence and won’t feel judged.
9. Work on your emotional intelligence
Emotional intelligence defines your ability to be self-aware and control your emotions, expressions, and actions. It also includes your ability to empathize with others and understand their emotions.
If you improve your emotional intelligence, you can cope with stressful situations better and sharpen your intuition. Your sharp intuition will help you understand others’ needs and desires… including your enemies.
You’ll console your loved ones better and make them feel comforted. You’ll even intimidate your enemies by reading their minds.
10. Be aware of yourself
Self-awareness is another of the important traits of a sigma male. Be aware of both your strengths and weaknesses. Learn to work on your weaknesses and never hide them. Know that you’re a human being and it’s okay to have flaws… but you must always look forward to working on them.
Learn from your mistakes and don’t insist that you’re perfect in any way… that’s not how sigma males lead their life. Don’t be ashamed to repeat your mistakes unknowingly. Remember that if you’re aware of your shortcomings, you can always improve yourself.
11. Depend on only yourself
You might have many dependable loved ones. They probably say that they’re always open to supporting you. But, in your journey to be a sigma male, learn to be self-reliant.
During crises, instead of hyperventilating and calling your close ones, calm yourself. Take a deep breath and try to figure out the solution by yourself. Even when you work in a group, don’t seek others’ help and believe in yourself.
When you doubt yourself, don’t depend on others’ validation or acceptance. Learn to validate yourself and boost your self-confidence.
12. Don’t seek others’ company
Whenever you want to try out something new, don’t seek your loved ones to go along with you. For instance, you’re excited to watch a new movie and nobody else is interested. Get a ticket for yourself and enjoy the show peacefully.
Sigma males love solitude because it heals them, stimulates them mentally, and helps them recharge. So, whenever others can’t make time for you, be glad to enjoy the benefits.
However, if you like to spend time with others and they’re available, don’t refuse them forcibly. Remember, being a sigma male must be enjoyable.
13. Never let others steal your space
Suppose you like to spend alone time. But, your family members hardly let you have a moment to yourself. It’s time to change the pace. Build solid boundaries about the time you want to yourself.
Tell others what you will and won’t tolerate during that time. Write it all down and give it to them. Discuss if they want to negotiate anything. However, if your loved ones don’t take you seriously, you can either lock your door or just go on a walk all by yourself.
14. Compete with yourself and not others
A sigma male doesn’t want to be the best… though it’s a different story that he’s naturally successful. So, don’t chase success too hard. Even if you’re driven by success, don’t judge your worth based on it. Because, the entire world will do that in your stead.
Moreover, don’t try to succeed, especially if you do it for validation. If you put extra effort into public appreciation, get out of this mindset.
Instead, realize that you’re worthy whether you get that promotion or not. Chase wins only when you want to prove yourself.
15. Don’t boast about yourself
Suppose you’re a winner in everything in life. Or, you’re knowledgeable about almost everything and people often compliment you. Make sure you stay humble despite how great you become.
You’ll never find the sigma male boasting about his power. He always silently works on his life, competes against himself, and appreciates himself without others’ knowledge.
So, even when you win the best in the world, keep it to yourself. Be thankful when people congratulate you but never spread the word yourself.
16. Respect others despite their archetype
The most impressive and heart-touching trait of lone wolves is their behavior. They don t care about the socio-sexual hierarchy. They treat an omega male or female no differently than alphas.
They aren’t partial to others because of these personality types made by Theodore Beale, also known as Vox Day!
So, whether you talk to your boss or the janitor, treat all of them respectfully. Don’t let this social construct disrupt your interpersonal relationships. Whether someone identifies as alpha or beta, be nice to everyone.
17. Take space but don’t forget to value people
When you take up space and spend time in solitude, don’t hurt others. Never treat your loved ones as if they’re less important or indispensable. When you seek space, respect the people that truly matter to you.
If the other person is literally a replaceable acquaintance, you can skip the extra effort… but never with your loved ones!
Being a sigma male never implies that you won’t have loved ones. So, don’t push them away and spend time with them so long it doesn’t distress or exhaust you.
18. Challenge yourself in any possible way
Another impressive trait of sigma males is their inclination toward risks. They like to challenge themselves and live on the edge. They thrive on the thrill of testing their limits. They don’t want to stay in their comfort zone forever and grab any opportunities to improve themselves.
Similarly, take risks whenever you notice a good risk-to-reward ratio. People might try to stop you, but believe in yourself, and you’ll succeed once you overcome it. Do it even if you need to be the lone wolf on this path.
19. Explore, experience, and learn
An exciting way to become a sigma is to set out on adventures. Take your time off from your studies and work whenever possible. Grab tickets to a new place and explore. This fabulous trip and the experiences will help you learn a lot about the world. The exposure will help you mature mentally.
You’ll learn different life lessons on your way. When you return, you’ll notice your horizons expanded way beyond!
20. Take criticism sportingly
As mentioned before, be self-aware and work on your flaws… but you can’t nurture this trait overnight! Some people aren’t that aware of themselves… and if you relate to it, don’t feel ashamed.
Instead, when people criticize you, don’t feel offended. Rather be glad that they pointed out what you should’ve noticed. Start working on yourself if you understand your shortcomings. But if you’re still lost, talk to your critic. If they want the best for you, they’ll have some cool suggestions.
21. Be motivated to reach your goals
If you fail in your endeavors or things don’t follow the plan, motivate yourself. Shut that inner critic because people are ready to criticize you whenever you make mistakes. Instead, love and heal yourself.
Don’t let the fear overcome you and understand that things will work out soon. Surround yourself with optimistic loved ones and make smaller goals to reach the final destination eventually.
22. Keep a tight circle and be loyal
To be a perfect sigma male, think twice before you accept someone as your friend. Your enemies will also want to enter your life as a friend and hurt you.
So, take time to know people and avoid showing your vulnerabilities until you can trust them. Build an inner circle with limited people to minimize drama. Don’t forget to be loyal to your close people and support them through thick and thin!
23. Don’t judge without knowing
When you hear rumors about anyone, don’t judge them too fast. Try to know the full story from them and understand their standpoint.
Until you find a reason to call them guilty, be empathetic toward them. Put yourself in their shoes and think about what you’d do. You might help them hang on and wait for justice.
Of course, if you believe they’re to be blamed, you’re free to judge.
24. Think before any decision
Think long and hard before making choices. Sigma males are deep thinkers and sometimes they even overthink. So, before you make crucial decisions, take your time. Don’t rush yourself just because people want you to hurry or because others are waiting.
Remember, you won’t get multiple chances to make important decisions. So, don’t miss the golden chance.
25. Never dwell on the past
You made lots of mistakes in the past and you might even make mistakes in the future. So, don’t feel guilty about that. Instead, focus on your future and fresh beginnings. Living in the past won’t help you progress or succeed.
So, live in the present and figure out what you can do to fix things. Don’t think about what-ifs.
A word from ThePleasantPersonality
Right now, you can’t wait to let your inner sigma take over. But simultaneously, you’re also worried about whether you can pull this plan through.
Whenever negative thoughts creep up, remember that you can change your personality if you set your mind to it. So, brush off the self-doubts and get on with work!
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...