Do you want to know how to deal with an alpha female? Do you know one in person and don’t know how to deal with her? Or, do you feel she’s too high and mighty and wants to take revenge?

Well, if you’re out to make war, then take a deep breath. This article will help you make peace and work on your connection whether you guys are lovers or acquaintances.

So, just head right in!

How to Deal with an Alpha Female?

The alpha female is pretty bossy, dominant, and intimidating. So, people often misunderstand her intentions. This even pushes away some of her closest people.

But it’s high time to change the story. So, let’s dive in!

1. Never stop her from chasing her dreams

A woman with an alpha female personality is stubborn about her goals. Even after failing on the first try, she won’t give up easily.

She spent a lot of time creating and planning for these goals. She knows what waits for her once she makes her dream come true.

Moreover, she’s intelligent and knows how to actualize her dreams. She doesn’t waste her breath on something futile. So, have faith in her even if the goals seem unattainable.

If you won’t support her, at least don’t stand in her way!

2. Don’t be afraid to express yourself

Most people assume that the alpha woman only cares about getting all the limelight. Well, she shares a lot about her achievements but never interferes with others when they express themselves. 

So, if you want to express yourself, you can 100% trust her to pay attention to you. You’ll feel heard even if she’s there while you speak, so express yourself to your heart’s desire.

Moreover, she has a high EQ, so she won’t say anything to hurt you. Instead, she’ll accommodate you accordingly based on your troubles.

3. Stop expecting her to stay in her comfort zone

Alpha women are born adventurers and risk-takers. They can’t sit in one position doing nothing all the time. They’d be too bored of that and need a rush of adrenaline from time to time.

They take new classes, experiment by themselves, read something new online or in the library, or do anything that gets them excited.

Their entire lives revolve around interesting and exciting stuff. So, don’t even think about stopping them. They’ll not only ignore such requests but also push you away.

4. Take her opinions positively

The alpha girl is always on others’ necks when they say something wrong… or so you think! Well, she’s way more intelligent and conscious than her peers and wants to spread consciousness to everyone.

She doesn’t truly mean to mock your lack of knowledge. Instead, she wants to help you so others don’t call you out for misinformation.

So, don’t be mad if she corrects you a lot. Of course, it can be pretty annoying at times. So, tell her to correct you secretly because you feel disrespected and she’ll happily oblige!

5. Never attack her beliefs

You can never play with the beliefs of an alpha female. Just as you have different opinions, ideas, and beliefs, she is the same. You won’t like it if anyone mocked you for your choices, and it’s the same for her.

She’ll always let you know what she believes in and defend those. You just can’t change her mind, so why even try?

Instead, accept that you’re both individuals and you both can be different. There’s no pressure to think or do the same thing.

6. Be glad that she’s straightforward

When she has something on her mind, she’ll let you know that directly. She won’t delay conveying her thoughts… even if that might offend or disrespect someone else.

She doesn’t shy away from expressing her thoughts. As per orthodox society, “she isn’t shy at all and hence flawed and unfeminine”.

Instead of calling her manly or uncultured for being straightforward, people must be glad. At least, she doesn’t play mind games to make you understand something. So, be grateful that she directly shares her thoughts!

7. Motivate her with competitions

Any alpha person – whether it’s the female or male counterparts – loves to compete and feel challenged. So, the alpha girl is extremely competitive… especially when it’s about being the best in something.

If you want her to improve her academic, professional, or other skills, challenge her as it motivates her to try harder.

She never backs off from proving herself. So, if she performs poorly in anything, just ask her to do better with a challenging attitude and watch her create miracles.

8. Don’t be intimidated by her

People feel intimidated by the alpha woman’s confidence. Everyone thinks twice before challenging her knowledge. The way she carries herself, makes everyone question their own judgment.

However, there’s no reason to believe that you’re not right so early. If you feel your judgment is right, don’t let her aura scare you. Instead, communicate to understand where you went wrong.

Don’t just back off because you’re wrong. Ask her the reason to get a better idea of the situation. This will help your growth and she’ll perceive you as a worthy opponent.

9. Don’t let her bossy attitude bother you

It’s a bit hard to deal with an alpha female if she has a leadership position. As a leader, she prefers to stay within the team instead of leading from above.

She works along with her team members and can notice whenever anyone goes wrong. That’s when her bossy attitude comes out and she starts micromanaging everyone.

Now, this is pretty annoying but don’t misunderstand her intentions. She only desires to make you guys as perfect as herself and help you reach the top.

Instead, communicate that you feel uncomfortable if she corrects you all the time and wants a bit more space.

10. Think about what you want if she doesn’t depend on you

If you’re in a relationship with an alpha female, she won’t depend on you regarding the major tasks. For instance, she’ll make her own money, be happy on her own, and won’t ask you to spend more time or money on her.

She can be the dream woman who won’t cling to you. So, if you can’t emotionally satisfy her, she won’t try to emotionally cheat on you. Rather, she’ll push you to actualize your dreams.

Now, if you like to take it easy, then this is the best for you, so just accept it.

If you want her to depend on you, take a few responsibilities by yourself instead!

11. If you’re dating her, just let her lead

The alpha female, in a relationship, is loving and caring but she prefers to lead the relationship. For instance, she decides the date venue, and activities or when you guys will settle down and get a baby.

She does all that because she knows better and is confident in her choices. So, why don’t you just let her have fun while you feel pampered?

Don’t care about what the world says and just enjoy the moment. But if you ever want to take the lead, communicate and reach a middle ground.

12. Be loyal or be gone

In romantic relationships, an alpha female is particular about a few things. She wants to date exclusively and expects her partner to only focus on her.

Alpha males especially get a lot of attention from potential partners. So, if you’re one, she’ll definitely act a bit crazy.

She also desires a healthy relationship without toxic traits.

If these demands aren’t satisfied, she won’t stay back in the relationship. So, prepare to commit to her. Don’t be “friends” with people that have a crush on you. Get rid of any toxic trait.

13. Keep her occupied with interesting things

She’s prone to get bored pretty frequently. She often studies new things from formal courses or practical life experiences. She likes to know about new things every day of her life.

So, if you’ll take an alpha female out on a date or have a creative and informal business meeting with an alpha female client, prepare beforehand. Figure out some interesting and unique activities for the day.

Make sure the activity is thrilling and not too easy. This is the best way to impress an alpha female in your personal or professional life.

14. Seek her help but don’t expect too much

Since she usually leads her circle, she can help you out with anything and everything. However, she is also a human being. Just like you, she can’t be bogged under others’ responsibilities 24/7.

So, understand the fact that she may still refuse you at times. After that, don’t request her even more or make her feel guilty about not helping you.

Be compassionate when she turns you down because she genuinely would’ve helped you. She’ll definitely get back to you after she’s done with her matters.

15. Let her help with communication

Alpha females are simply the best mediators and peacemakers. If you get into a fight or others fight, just let the alpha woman handle the situation.

She has fabulous communication skills, so she can mediate the thoughts of difficult people pretty easily. Without aid, the concerned people might fight the entire night. But, with her expertise, they’ll reach a solution or middle ground in no time.

So, don’t delay and quickly call her to take care of the fight.

16. Be inspired and be eager to learn more

The alpha female is at the top of the female socio-hierarchy. So, of course, she has multiple talents and skills.

Confidence, intelligence, foresight, mediating skills, communication skills, listening skills, and emotional intelligence… you name it and she has it all!

So, stick to her and learn as much as you can from her. If she’s the leader of your team, you can ask her to teach you a few skills. But if she’s not, you might feel awkward asking that. So, just observe and learn!

17. Seek attention if you feel neglected

She is all about having a healthy work-life balance. She is pretty ambitious, but she never lets that stop her from enjoying her life.

Instead, she puts equal effort into socializing with friends and spending quality time with her family. So, if you ever feel neglected, just say the word.

18. Take time to break in her heart

If you’re just acquaintances, she might act a bit detached. If you want to be her friend or lover, take your time to show your emotions and commitment.

Since she is pretty wary of people’s intentions, she won’t easily let you in her heart. People might dishearten you and ask you to pick another girl.

But if you truly like her, just stick to the plan. Try so hard that you grow tired of trying. She’ll definitely open up to you. But if she doesn’t, move on!

19. Never try to put her down with her shortcomings

The alpha woman is aware of her weaknesses and shortcomings. She’s also pretty open about it. Contrary to popular opinion, she isn’t afraid of showing her shortcomings to others.

Instead, she’s open to learning new things from knowledgeable people and sources. So, if you want to insult her with her limitations, hard luck!

If someone else tries to pull this trick too, stop them. Eventually, she’ll get all the limelight even while she learns new things. So, don’t try to get back at her with those… instead, help her learn a few things to show that you’re better than her!

20. Don’t look down on her because she’s a woman

Alpha women usually make more careers in masculine fields. Hardly any woman enters these careers but it’s not anything physically demanding.

Many men look down on her because of her gender. But they fail to understand that the alpha female is mentally as sharp as them.

So, if you know an alpha female competitor at work or school, don’t look down on her. Treat her respectfully and compete fairly. Convince others to not bully her either.

Otherwise, they’ll be way more ashamed when they fail.

21. Listen to her or be prepared to be out of the team

For starters, know that she doesn’t desire to control others as a leader. Instead, she believes in her team’s maturity.

If you don’t follow her suggestions, she’ll never force you to do anything. Instead, she’ll expect you to choose something even better.

However, if your actions hurt the entire team or her performance, she’ll not entertain that. She doesn’t compromise with her own goals. So, she’ll respectfully ask you to leave the team.

So, in short, there are only a few options: follow her, choose better while staying within the team, or just leave!

22. If she’s too focused on her career and has yet to find her partner, communicate

If you have a crush on her and she’s too focussed on her career, express yourself. Since you’re not a priority yet, just let her know about your feelings.

You can’t force anyone to accept your feelings. But, ask her to allow you more time from her schedule. Promise her that you won’t interfere with her work and would love to spend time together any time she’s free.

If you’re a loved one and she’s single and focused on work, don’t force her to date. Instead, just know what she truly wants and accept her choice.

23. Stop passing your opinions on her

Her choices are way different than others in her personal and professional life. So, people often advise her to follow the usual plan.

However, she is born to take risks and try adventures. She knows her worth and doesn’t let anyone treat her less. If she fails, she tries hard enough to fulfill her dreams.

Though she doesn’t care about people’s negative opinions, she can’t help feeling offended by unwanted suggestions.

So, before spilling any words, think twice about what she expects and wants in life!

24. Help her even if she doesn’t ask

She’s too shy to seek help as she feels that people might judge her. She always claims to stay independent, so seeking help is the last thing on her mind.

So, even if she never asks for it, keep a close eye on her. If she struggles in anything, support her if possible, or drop hints if she won’t let you help at all.

25. Communicate to understand her

Alpha women are often misunderstood and this is actually researched and proven. So, instead of assuming anything, try to communicate whatever you’re curious about. Don’t spread or believe false info unless it comes from herself or you have proof.

Even if you feel that something is definitely true, ask her directly to know for sure!

A word from ThePleasantPersonality

The alpha woman is truly a handful to deal with. So, don’t assume that things will change overnight. Let her understand that you’re eager to work things out and feel more secure. Once she is less wary of you, you’ll both hit it off. So, until then, hang on!

Article Sources


1. https://inspiringtips.com/asia/signs-of-an-alpha-female/
2. https://www.viralbake.com/alpha-woman/
3. https://www.marriage.com/advice/relationship/signs-of-an-alpha-female/
4. https://thetrulycharming.com/alpha-female/