So, you’ve been thinking about what to do if you’re a beta male? The results of your personality test just came in and you can’t help but freak out?
Welp, good thing you tried researching online! Because this think-piece promises to help you out till the end. You’ll improve yourself just enough to feel calmer in no time.
So, let’s dive in!
What to do if you’re a beta male?
Being a beta male, you’re probably worried whether you hurt anyone due to your personality. Well, you never offend others, but you definitely put yourself in bad situations.
So, it’s time to work on yourself here…
1. Take small decisions to break the stereotype
An unfavorable beta male behavior is the dependence on others for life decisions. If you are a beta man, you can’t take major decisions at all. Especially, if it also includes others’ welfare, you feel anxious about it.
Since people have great expectations from their leaders or decision-makers, you just can’t stand to be under such pressure. You don’t have any desire to be perfect and others’ expectations make you lose your mind.
So, deal with this issue in baby steps. Try to make insignificant and smaller choices in life. For instance, order takeout for everyone on the weekend or help with small chores at home.
Build your confidence with the smaller steps and slowly make more serious decisions.
2. Before helping anyone ask them about it
Beta men are known to be helpful to everyone. That’s an outstanding trait in this selfish era, but that puts you in vulnerable situations.
You do the job of a good friend to others, but do they return the favor to you? Everyone you help may not be bad, but some of them have poor intentions.
You fall prey to opportunists especially because you never ask the other person’s reason behind needing help.
So ask them if it’s because they tried everything and still can’t make it. Or, is it because they just didn’t give enough effort and want a shortcut?
Understand the other person’s motive instead of blindly trusting them.
3. Think through when you avoid conflicts
Another of the notorious beta male traits is conflict avoidance. Beta males lack the mental energy to deal with a confrontation. It’s because they are always afraid of spoiling their relationships with conflicts.
However, it’s time to change this charade because this ultimately hurts your relationships even more. Your loved ones feel frustrated because you can’t be honest with them.
Moreover, facing conflicts helps you deal with poor situations faster. Even during fights, both sides communicate their demands and needs transparently and they figure things out eventually.
So, avoid conflict only if you can’t figure things out at all. Don’t avoid it to save others from heartbreak!
4. Know that It’s okay to say “No”
Beta guys are also known to be the “Yes-Man” throughout their life. Again, because they desire to be the proverbial nice guy, they just can’t refuse others.
So, you always put yourself in unfavorable circumstances because you can’t let others down. You always want to make others happy but at what cost?
You can’t live your life just because of one word – NO.
Moreover, this often puts you in awkward social situations, so get rid of this habit. Now, you can’t change this overnight, so let’s do something fun!
Challenge yourself to say “No” to groundless requests. Treat yourself to something nice if you can stick to your word till the end of the day.
5. Understand what you truly want
You often let society rule over your life. Due to the characteristics of a beta male, you often give up on anything that triggers society somehow.
Just because you don’t want to “burden” them, you let go of your dreams and desires.
However, are you being fair to yourself? Does society matter more than your happiness?
You’ll never get this moment or opportunity back, so why sacrifice?
So, whenever you worry about what society might say or think, prioritize yourself. Understand your thoughts, needs, and desires.
Once you identify these, don’t let others define your choices and needs. Remember, life only happens once, so never let it go in vain!
6. Be a little more forward in love
Beta men pay attention to their partners, give emotional support, and invest time and effort in them. However, they hardly ever confess their feelings.
Their crushes friend zone them thinking that they are just being friendly. After all, they never gave such signals of romantic interest. So, dating a beta male needs a lot of patience.
However, what if someone else acts more proactively and impresses your crush?
Exactly, even that thought devastates you! So, get over your shy attitude and try to be a bit more forward. It’s okay if you don’t wanna make a spectacle out of your confession. But at least, be honest and open about your feelings to them.
7. Don’t let personality issues sabotage your relationships
Right now, you are happy with your personality. While you are in your comfort zone, you feel calm, relaxed, and content.
However, people around you won’t ever be satisfied with your choices. It’s not exclusive to you but everyone faces the same.
But people specifically compare you with the true alpha men until you break down. At some point, you might burn in jealousy because the world treats you unfairly. They worship the alpha male and mock you even though you are second!
Just make sure you don’t let the bitter things get to you. Otherwise, you’ll lose all of your loved ones and their support.
8. Avoid dating independent partners
Being a beta male, you are more prone to get into codependent relationships. You need your partner to make the crucial decisions while you stay in your comfort zone. So, you can’t sustain a romantic relationship with an independent partner for too long.
They’ll feel burdened if you depend on them for the decisions. You’ll feel bad because you hurt them in some way. This is a perfect recipe for a disaster!
So, it’s better to not get into one from the very beginning.
That’s why, before you approach anyone with romantic intentions, ask them about themselves. Know their needs from a relationship. If your needs and desires don’t complement, it’s a poor match!
9. Control your body language in social gatherings
Due to your introversion, you are not confident in social settings. You like to stay at home or hang out with your loved ones.
It’s not that you don’t socialize at all. In fact, when necessary, you attend events. But you lack the minimum confidence to conduct yourself publicly.
For instance, you avert eye contact, can’t speak coherently, or can’t shake hands firmly. These are all signs of insincerity and send the wrong signals to the other side!
So, work on your body language in public. Remind yourself to maintain eye contact once in a while. Practice comfortably smiling and talking to yourself in front of a mirror.
10. Think before pushing away risks
You are risk-avoidant and prefer to stay in your comfort zone. “Play safe and be secure” is your life motto. In both school and work, you don’t try to get adventurous.
Instead, you follow others’ lead to safely reach your goals. You’re afraid of what crises you might face if you take a different step. After all, you’ll have nobody to depend on then!
However, risks are nothing but opportunities. If things work out, you grow more in life and reach a better position with far greater benefits.
Of course, no need to dive into the crazy pool of risks. Rather, think hard and then take the smaller risks to avoid great damage.
11. Stop being “average”
Whether in academics or at school, you intentionally give a mediocre performance. Since you don’t desire to become an influential person, you let everything go.
You don’t unleash your true capabilities probably because you fear someone might push you for more. However, you forget that people around you are affected by your choices.
For instance, when you don’t fare well in school, your homeroom and subject teachers wonder how they can help you. They call your parents to know if something is wrong.
On the other hand, at work, you might easily overdo this laid-back attitude. If the quality of your work isn’t good enough, the organization might be severely affected. They might even consider replacing you!
So, try to maintain an above-average performance to avoid unnecessary troubles.
12. Complete what you pick
Due to your lack of ambition at work, you often take it too easy at work. You might take too long to complete your tasks as you don’t wanna be anyone’s competitor.
Sometimes, you even give up on tough tasks way earlier than usual. You don’t even put enough effort into it. But that’s pretty unprofessional, so let’s change this for good!
Talk to your supervisor and discuss some details about your workload. After understanding your tasks, take them and work them out till the end if you feel confident in them. Or, don’t take it at all and let someone else work on it.
This will also save your supervisor from the hassle of reassigning tasks.
13. Don’t sit idly while you wait for help
When there’s a crisis, you don’t feel alert or concerned about the situation. Rather, you turn more relaxed and lethargic. You wait for others to notice the issue and help you out.
However, you only waste your time with that. Others might not always be available as they have their own things to do. And within that time, you might make things work by yourself.
So, just believe in yourself and keep trying to fix things. If you have no idea, ask someone and get on with it. Don’t wait for others’ help for that. Otherwise, you’ll put yourself and others in real trouble!
14. If you lack discipline, it’s time to change that
Most beta males are betas because they don’t want to be on the top. The responsibility of being the top guy makes them anxious and they choose to be comfortable.
However, some men are betas only because they don’t have what it takes to reach the top. They don’t have those great qualities to rule the world because they are undisciplined.
So, if you are this type of beta male, it’s time to follow a routine for your daily life. Be dedicated to it if you truly want to improve. Watch motivational videos to keep your spirits high.
If anything stops you from improving yourself, confide in a trustworthy persona and seek help.
15. Work on your physical strength
Not all, but some beta males are physically frail. It’s either because they don’t work out, are addicted, or have a low-quality diet or routine.
So, if you are the same, it’s high time you do something about it. Otherwise, your prospective partners and even your workplace will judge and reject you based on your appearance.
Begin with a healthy diet and try to diminish substance use. Enroll in rehab if the addiction is beyond help. Try out at-home exercise or go for a jog.
If you see no change, get a gym membership and make the most out of it. Make sure you stay dedicated to your routine whether visible changes appear or not.
16. Be humble but don’t stand for disrespect
Being a beta male, you love to stay modest about your accomplishments. The last thing you want to do is boast about yourself.
This is probably because you are worried that not everyone around you is doing well. You just don’t want to kill their spirits by rubbing your wins on their face.
However, people often assume that you didn’t achieve anything at all. They make fun of you because you never show them what’s going on in your life.
If you don’t want to reveal the truth, get away from such people. There is no need to let them stay in your life.
17. Claim your rights
You lack any sense of entitlement, so you never demand anything and just accept whatever you get. You never ask people to respect or validate you for your part.
Since you are confident about yourself, you don’t need any external appreciation. Though that’s a great quality, it’s not right to let others treat you like garbage.
This way you only enable more people to mistreat you. So, be straightforward and ask to be respected. It’s not easy to say it out loud, but unless you do that nothing will change!
18. Remember that everyone around you doesn’t have good intentions
You look approachable and don’t intimidate others. So, everyone feels comfortable approaching you. However, within that crowd that you meet regularly, you never know who is an ill-wisher.
So, don’t assume that everyone around you needs help. Be more alert about new people in your surroundings.
You might debate that they’d get nothing by hurting you. Well, that’s only your assumption, so don’t be too casual about your safety.
19. Respect people but don’t be shy to draw boundaries
You respect everyone despite their qualifications, age, capabilities, and so on. After facing a lot of discrimination, you want everyone to accept you as you are.
So, you lead the path by setting examples. But does everyone get that point?
Some people are just way too stuck up! They believe they get respected because they deserve it and don’t understand the concept of mutual respect.
People that can’t respect you don’t deserve it back.
No, you don’t need to disrespect them. But, make sure that you don’t treat them too kindly or make special exceptions for them!
20. Check in with mental health therapist or a support group
You are way too kind to others and blame yourself for refusing or having conflicts with others. Leadership activities make you anxious. Society often judges your actions and belittles you.
Every day you feel too many negative emotions and process them all alone. This can impact your mental health severely. So, either confide in trustworthy loved ones or seek a therapist. Don’t take this lightly, and take care of yourself!
A word from ThePleasantPersonality
You’re pretty laid back, so you may not agree with all the tips. That’s when you must speak to a close one. Ask their viewpoint on it and be more certain.
Moreover, the tips are pretty tough to follow through, so don’t get demotivated. Never give up too soon because there aren’t visible changes.
Good things are hard to get, so be patient till the end. Believe in the fact that you have the power to improve yourself and carry on!
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...