Are you concerned about what to do if you’re a gamma male? People are fed up with you but you don’t know how to fix things? Or, are you wondering about ways to be more likable?
Well, this think-piece will share everything with you. If you follow the steps well, you’ll definitely change others’ perceptions about you in no time.
So, head right in!
What to Do if You’re a Gamma Male?
Honestly, it’s not that everything is bad about you. You have good traits but your negative parts often overshadow those. Some people find gamma male personalities annoying and don’t believe you can improve yourself.
But don’t feel low, because it’s time to prove them wrong. So, let’s get started!
1. Even if your skills are limited, don’t be insecure
Due to the personality traits of a gamma male, you’re intelligent but only in two or three nerd things. You are not great in everything like sigma males or alpha males.
Everyone gets their hopes high about you being an all-rounder even though you aren’t. They push you to try harder and be like the top men in the socio-sexual hierarchy.
But when you fail their expectations, everyone looks down on you. And quite frankly, this feels the worst but remember your strength. It’s great to have even one good strong suit… but you have a handful. Don’t let others’ thoughts pull down your spirits.
2. Understand that being kind doesn’t make you better
You’re kind and empathetic to help everyone in the vicinity. Not everyone is like that and you feel you’re different from others. It’s okay to be happy about being a good man. However, everything goes downhill when this feeling levels up to the nice guy syndrome.
You believe that since you’re better than the men around you, people notice you more. You also assume that women like kind men more than anything else.
However, the world doesn’t work like that. Yes, you’re kind… but no, women don’t fall for your compassionate actions. It doesn’t make you a better romantic partner than other men. Women won’t magically feel attracted to you.
3. Work on your appearances
Owing to your gamma male personality, you’re pretty much out of shape. But before you misunderstand anything, remember that this doesn’t imply you’re “ugly” but your physical appearance says a lot about you.
If you don’t look your best, you’ll be judged in both romantic and professional life.
Employers will judge your capabilities on your looks. Especially, if you’re a job seeker, they’ll assume you’re unhealthy and won’t be able to commit to work in the long run.
On the other hand, women think that if you can’t care for yourself, how will you maintain their lifestyle?
So, follow a healthy routine with a balanced diet, regular sleep, and regular exercise.
4. Don’t assume a woman’s needs, ask her
Gamma male personality types are also known to be hopeless romantics. Well, nothing is wrong if you believe in courting your woman in the traditional style. In fact, it can make many maiden’s hearts skip a beat.
However, the troubles come when you believe that grand gestures alone will do the trick. You’re so immersed in fairy tales and romance novels and movies that you become overconfident.
You don’t notice that everything else like your appearance and success also matters. So, instead of assuming her desires in a man, ask. Find out what your crush desires in the man of her dreams. Even if you can’t completely change, try to embrace some qualities.
5. Don’t compensate one thing with another
If a woman rejects you for looks, you want to compensate for that with gifts and gestures. You want to show her your kind and sweet heart and make her ignore her needs in a man.
Listen up, just because a woman isn’t superficial, it doesn’t imply that she can’t have standards… Everyone expects their partner to look somewhat good.
After all, without it, how will you attract someone? And attraction is important for romance.
Listen, buddy, your loving gestures always count. But those work only when the other person acknowledges you as a potential romantic partner.
If you’re not hot, strong, or financially stable, she won’t think of you more than a friend. Your actions will only make you her “good friend”, not even the best friend.
Don’t try to compensate for your looks or wealth with romantic moves. Even if you do, don’t have an entitled attitude because that’ll just backfire.
6. Don’t let jealousy ruin your image
Since, alphas, betas, and sigmas have a much better experience in their dating life, you feel jealous of them. You hate how everyone loves them for being richer, more successful, or more handsome.
You can’t stand the fact that they can attract high-value women so easily. So, you have a hidden hatred towards these men. Even if they didn’t steal your crush or hardly know about your existence, you dislike them.
When men and women compliment these men, you make a huge deal out of it. You tell them the men did nothing great to deserve it. Your jealousy makes you appear like a loser, so stop once and for all!
7. Be mysterious
Work on concealing your true emotions. You are like an open book and everyone knows everything about you. You are bad at attracting women because they already know everything about you.
Do you know why they chase alpha and sigma males?
Due to the air of mystery around them, women feel attracted to them. They want to know more about those men. Their thirst to know them better results in a romantic connection.
So, don’t be so transparent around people. Don’t share all of your thoughts and opinions in one go. Keep your private life to yourself. If someone wants to know more about you, let them put in some effort. Value your thoughts and don’t spill them everywhere.
8. Or, just work on better thoughts
Sometimes, it’s not just because you’re an open book. Rather, your thoughts are the true culprit behind it. If your opinions and thoughts are too judgmental and negative, people will push you away even with the mysterious vibes.
They might be intrigued initially, but when they find your true thoughts, they won’t entertain you for long.
For instance, you think you’re entitled to love for being a kind and romantic man. Or, you judge sigma, alpha, and beta males for getting more attention everywhere.
Change these flawed thoughts otherwise it’ll be hard to fix women’s perceptions about you. If you respect people from within, you’ll create a better impression on people.
9. You aren’t the alpha, so stop deluding yourself
Due to your personality type, you also suffer from a delusion of grandeur. You believe that you’re the true alpha male and people just can’t recognize you yet. Since you’re the best in your group, you believe it even more strongly.
But did you ever judge the IQ of the people around you?
You’ll know that it’s just average or even less. So, don’t conclude something like that without testing your surroundings.
On the other hand, you feel that a tougher dating life means that you’re not a playboy. You feel you’re much better than most men. But your dating scenes don’t change your value. So, stop thinking that way as it only stops you from working on yourself.
Accept that you’re a gamma and only then can you truly improve yourself.
10. Avoiding conflict will only help if it’s for the greater good
Human beings avoid conflict for two reasons: they don’t want to hurt the other person. Or, they don’t want to face a tough situation.
You are the latter and this is a true flaw. You avoid conflict just because you don’t want to face the negative situations directly. It’ll only pile up all the negative emotions and lead to a worse situation. This will put both you and the other person in an uncomfortable situation.
Avoid conflict only if you feel that the issue isn’t big enough to have one. If you don’t want to hurt others and resolve the issue in other ways, it’s only okay then. Otherwise, this is an absolutely bad choice!
11. Passive aggression definitely won’t help in the long run
When you avoid conflicts, you don’t get over your anger. Instead of charging against your opponent directly, you just show passive aggression. You make small mistakes intentionally to get on their nerves.
But this attitude won’t help if they hurt your loved ones. If the other person is truly at fault, you must seek justice. If not, your loved ones will be disappointed in you. Moreover, you’ll always get the shorter side of the stick unless you speak out. Learn to stand up for yourself in troublesome times.
But if they did nothing wrong yet you act this way, you’ll only invite trouble.
12. Learn to take small risks
You have an irrational fear of failure due to this personality type. And honestly, this issue is completely out of your hand. You can’t control your fears of risks and failures.
You probably heard enough from others that “you can’t succeed in life if you don’t take risks”. Or, “risks are rare opportunities and you missed all of it”.
Society constantly looks down on you for being this way. Yet nobody helps you overcome the fear.
So, communicate with your trustworthy loved ones about it. Tell them you want to take small steps. With their help and support, take minute risks. You’ll eventually reach a better position in life.
13. But don’t let anyone push you
Once you start this journey, people around you will be more excited than you. Out of sheer excitement, they might even push you to take major steps at once.
Your nosy aunt or neighbor will always encourage you to rush. But bro, don’t let them influence you about this. It’s your life and you have the right to take it easy.
If you feel mentally drained by such suggestions, politely ask them to stop. If they can’t, walk away. It doesn’t matter if they think you’re rude. Your mental health and safety matter the most. Remember, if you fail, these people will only have fun from a distance.
14. Stop with the name calling and assumptions
Deep inside, you know you are not the best. You’re aware of your flaws yet you lie to yourself. You cover the truth with petty lies to feel better about yourself. You don’t want to face the facts.
Due to your denial, whenever a woman turns you down, you call her a golddigger. Or, due to your jealousy, when a man has a better shot at dating, you call him a “playboy” or “Casanova”.
With this, you burn bridges in the worst possible way. You never know how this might reflect in your future. It also makes you seem weak. So, change your mindset for good!
15. Learn to court her right
You feel that if you throw a few grand romantic gestures here and there, women will fall for you instantly. You feel entitled to romance and sex right after you help them out.
No, dating or courting isn’t an easy feat. You gotta nurture a connection with a woman slowly. You must flirt, know about each other’s interests, spend time with common interests, and engage with her gradually.
You don’t understand what a woman needs to open up and create a romantic bond. For a more detailed idea, follow self-help books to flirt and connect with women.
16. In relationships, learn to give space
In your romantic relationships, you might become extremely clingy. Since you’re a hopeless romantic, you believe that after a relationship, couples only spend time with each other. At least, that’s your definition of a loving bond.
However, your partner also has friends and family. Don’t expect her to sacrifice her social life for you. Just because she spends time away from you, it doesn’t mean she loves you any less. Sometimes, she’ll also need time to recharge herself.
So, accept that she needs time away from you. If you smother her too much in the name of love, she’ll only push you away. While she’s busy, indulge in your own interests and have fun.
17. Never let others manipulate your emotions
Due to your emotional hypersensitivity, did you know that you’re prone to manipulation?
If you don’t, let’s explain this.
You do something a person likes and they compliment you about it. You feel great about yourself and do it even more because of the instant good feeling.
On the other hand, when you do something that ticks them off, they obviously criticize you. Criticism and rejection impact your self-confidence negatively.
To feel better about yourself, you do things that they prefer. You seek validation repeatedly and become an easy manipulation target.
So, before you do anything, understand the reason behind it. If it’s because you’re addicted to being validated, stop yourself.
18. Think before you ignore an advice
When people advise you on anything, you often ignore them. You believe you’re the best and you can’t be wrong. This confidence usually comes from being intelligent in your own field.
It’s genuinely awesome that you feel great about yourself. However, don’t ignore suggestions so casually. Give it a good thought and even discuss how it’ll help you. Before you say someone is wrong, understand the situation better.
19. It’s okay to make mistakes but learn from them
Now, suppose you didn’t listen to the advice and it led to the worst situation ever. You act in denial and blame your life, fate, society, and everything else but you.
This is possibly because it hurts your pride to accept defeat. But, everyone makes mistakes and that’s natural, so don’t dwell on them for too long.
However, if you throw a tantrum, people won’t appreciate that and will avoid you. Instead, learn from your mistakes and try to fix your situation. Listen to others next time.
20. Seek a mental health therapist if you need
Not to discourage you but you have a lot of issues. You’re conflict-avoidant, risk-averse, jealous, suffer from nice guy syndrome, feel entitled, and so on.
These troubles might have some deeper reasons behind them. So, if you try hard enough to follow this guide yet nothing works, seek a professional ASAP. If there’s any deep and hidden issue, you can take care of it soon!
A word from ThePleasantPersonality
Before you begin your journey, remember that your reputation is pretty bad. So, the steps to self-improvement will be equally tough.
So, if you ask me how fast you can improve, the wrong question! Stay focused on this guide and don’t obsess over time. If you’re distracted, you can’t be your best.
So, take time, give effort, and you’ll eventually change for the better!