Wanna know how to deal with type H personalities? Don’t know how to show them the right way of life even if you want to? Troubled while coordinating with them?
I completely understand how you feel, so I prepared this think-piece with that in mind. But I do hope that you figured out which H-type they are because there are 2 types… if you didn’t, I recommend you find that first.
But if you already have the answer, just dig in!
How to Deal with Type H Personalities – healing?
If you’re around a healing H-type person, you’re probably amazed at how they trust everyone so much and act chill all the time. Be honest, I know you often worry about them getting in trouble. So, if you want to deal with them better, here’s your chance to know the secrets…
1. Understand them better
To deal with people with H personality types, you must understand them. I have other think-pieces about their traits, strengths, weaknesses, motivators, and fears… but that’s not the end of knowing them.
Suppose you and your sibling take personality tests and get the same result… but you still can’t say you’re both the same or the traits match you both 100%. This is because human beings are unique despite these generalizations.
So, the knowledge of their personality isn’t enough. Spend more time with them to truly understand them from the inside out. You will know their exact worries that way and know how to support them during difficulties better. You’ll also know when to seek their help and what to avoid mentioning around them.
If it’s a type H loved one, spend time with them as you wish. But if you know them on a formal platform, try to understand them from afar based on their behavior and actions.
2. Help them when they struggle
A type H person doesn’t like to depend on others when they face setbacks. They don’t like to complain, act feeble, or wait for others to notice their troubles. They also believe in their own capabilities more than ever. So, even if they face stubborn problems, they won’t tell you about them.
Suppose a type H coworker is responsible for a group task and you’re also part of it, stay alert. Otherwise, they’ll struggle all alone and won’t even let the team members know. Their stubbornness might also slow down the overall team’s performance.
So, don’t wait for them to seek your help. Rather, keep an eye on their progress. If you notice they are stuck in something, give them a limited time to sort things out. If they can’t, intrude and divide the chores among everyone. Of course, if you have tight deadlines, it’s okay to not wait for too long.
3. Respect their boundaries
Type H people are pretty particular about their boundaries. They set strong boundaries in all areas of their life. Even if someone tries to negotiate their boundaries, they stick to their decision. If you force them into changing their mind, these sweethearts will never overreact but won’t even give in to you.
Though they can keep their temper in control, they feel exhausted when people persist at their point. Deep within, their perceptions about you worsen if you don’t take their boundaries seriously. So, try to respect their boundaries and avoid forcing them into something they refused once.
Just because they didn’t say it with a serious and stern expression, doesn’t imply you can change their mind. If you respect their boundaries, they’ll trust you more. Otherwise, they’ll intentionally avoid you to not face similar situations again.
4. Practice healthy boundaries
While you respect their boundaries, this is also a great opportunity to be strict about yours. If you often get coerced into things you dislike or don’t want to, people will treat you like a pushover.
Though a type H person won’t judge you for it, they’ll understand that you don’t have a sense of boundary… so, you might violate theirs someday.
You might say that’s an absurd deduction, but human beings perceive everyone the way they are. A saint believes every soul is holy while a thief is suspicious of everyone around them. Similarly, someone who lets others violate their boundaries might take others lightly.
The entire world works this way, you can’t change how someone’s mind works on it. So, try to be stricter about your limits despite how close the other person is and show that you cherish your likes and dislikes.
5. Believe in them
A type H person never gives up in life and even during the worst moments, they believe in miracles. But don’t assume that they just sit idly waiting for something to happen on its own. Instead, they research the causes of the issue, ways to deal with the causes, the troubles’ effects, and the possible ways to deter them.
Most people might assume that they are just being willful and that nothing will come out of it. But that’s the wrong approach. This will make them feel even more stubborn and prove themselves to others. So, when they start their research and stay hopeful, don’t nitpick them too early.
Allow them to try their best and find solutions for their troubles. Don’t judge their actions and approaches right from the beginning. Your faith in them might help them grow and progress a lot in life.
6. But also stop them from trying in vain
Though it’s great to support someone when all odds are against them, think carefully from your perspective. If you feel that waiting for a miracle will only shatter their heart… or seeking solutions to their problems, wasting their effort and resources and worsening their situation, step in.
No, don’t stop them abruptly in their way to say that they are wrong. That doesn’t help anyone in any way and instead provokes willfulness. So, do your research while they are busy.
Find out the reasons why you feel that their approach won’t help them. They’ll always welcome your constructive criticism as it’ll help them avoid worse outcomes. Never throw criticism without any proper reason… because that seems like complaining.
Be open to discussing the issue. Afterward, you both can find out whether it’s really worth investing more time, energy, and resources or not.
7. Stop them from being kind to the wrong people
Type H folks show kindness to everyone around them. They don’t judge the other person for that. They are equally compassionate towards the rich and poor or a loved one and stranger. However, this trait often puts them in danger of being taken advantage of or being targeted for crime.
Opportunists feel that pretending to be poor and troubled is the best way to cheat them. Some people might repeatedly hurt them, pretend that it was unintentional, and apologize… the type H person lets things go. Some people might simply misinterpret their kindness as romantic love and make them feel guilty.
Neither can you stay beside them and watch their every move… nor can you read the other person’s mind. But, whenever you notice something is off about the other person, warn your type H acquaintance. They’ll eventually learn to protect themselves.
8. Show them how good it feels to vent
A type H individual doesn’t complain even if they suffer because of others’ deeds. They don’t want to come off as whiny and immature to others. However, this only becomes a burden to their mind. They might even get sick because of their suppressed emotions. But even if you tell them to be more expressive, they won’t agree.
So, show it to them practically when you feel frustrated about something. Make them accompany you, get dead drunk (or not, your wish) and whine about your troubles… or, go to a deserted place together and scream out your darkest emotions. Show them that you feel better after doing that.
This will encourage them to pour out their frustrations too. Unless they see something, they’ll stick to their own beliefs, so proving it is your best bet.
9. Seek help to normalize it
Again, you have your own life and worries and can’t always keep an eye on them. You won’t know when your type H acquaintance needs help… after all, you can only do so much by yourself. So, again use proof to change their mind… because just asking them to do something doesn’t help.
Whenever you’re stuck in a situation, go seek help from them. They’ll gladly help you… and that’s when you tell them that you would love to experience the same happiness… that you also want to help them when they are in trouble.
If they ever mention their honest feelings about not wanting to seem needy or whiny, ask them if they feel like that about you when you seek help. This will eventually help them realize that seeking help isn’t anything bad. While they are capable, it also helps them broaden their horizons.
10. Teach them how to deal with persistent people
Due to their gentle nature, they often meet persistent people that think “Oh if I push harder, they’ll agree with me”. You can handle these situations differently based on your relationship with the type H person.
Suppose, it’s a loved one, you guys are out clubbing, and someone insists on buying them a drink or taking them home. Jump in between your friend and that person.
Ask them what they need from your date… despite your gender. For an added intimidating look, stare them dead in the eye with a poker face. Your friend will learn their lesson and act accordingly.
If you have a formal relationship with them like coworkers or teacher-students and often notice them facing such people, don’t take things into your hand. Later teach them how you deal with them.
But if your acquaintance is the other H-type, here you go with your tips…
How to Deal with Type H Personalities – honesty-humility?
This H-type is based on the HEXACO model (honesty-humility, emotionality extraversion, agreeableness, conscientiousness, and openness to experience) of Lee and Ashton, and the H is actually an addition to the Big Five personality traits.
If your acquaintance is this one, you know they are extremely picky about immoral folks and act pretty detached from anything related to money and fortune. So, if you’re struggling to deal with them, here you go…
1. Show eagerness to learn more about them
A person with higher levels of the H factor in personality has stronger morals than anyone else. But you don’t know what their strong morals and ethics include. To deal with them perfectly, know more about their views, perceptions, and ideas about life.
Communicate with them often and spend more time around them to understand their turnoffs. Tell them that you find them interesting and wish to know them better.
This will encourage them to show their true selves to others. They will also be as candid with you as possible… and you’ll know exactly what to avoid angering them. Specifically, you’ll know which morals might tick them off. So, try hard to avoid those and enjoy an amicable bond with them.
2. Reward their good morals
Individuals with a high Type H personality are trustworthy, helpful, truthful, caring, and are a combination of everything good. They are also not interested in anything materialistic but that has a pretty bad side effect.
They don’t feel motivated by money or materials at all. In the office, they don’t work harder to get a pay raise. In competitions, they hardly ever try to win because they don’t feel attracted to the prize.
Once they reach a certain level of comfort and stability, they don’t try harder. Their progress stops as they seek stability instead. This disappoints both their loved ones and their supervisors. After all, their qualities make everyone hopeful about their future.
To rekindle the flame of trying harder, reward them for their little efforts or even their good morals. Awaken the desire to have more in them. When they get bonuses or gifts, their loved ones will seem excited. They’ll eventually return to the track and strive for better.
3. Stop them from judging others
When a type H person judges someone for a difference in morals, stop them immediately. Tell them that everyone is different from them including you. Ask them if they also judge you similarly for that. Remind them that most of their loved ones don’t have the same morals as them.
Ask them if they also feel that way about their loved ones. Just because someone thinks a certain way, they aren’t bad people. Tell them if the other person hurt them in some way.
If they did, you can’t change their mind and must give up. However, if they didn’t, remind them that their behavior is immoral in this situation because they’re being cruel to someone without a reason.
4. Make them hang out with all sorts of people
Not all type H people show contempt towards people with different morals. Some only judge others silently in their mind. So, you won’t get the opportunity to change their mind. So, invite your type H acquaintance to social events. Expose them to all kinds of people and get used to the world.
They’ll understand that most people don’t have high morals like them, but none of them are bad. When they start making friends and know others on a personal level, they’ll understand how wrong they were to judge others based on one parameter alone.
This will also help them adjust their judgment of others. They will still jump to conclusions, but it’ll be much less than usual. They’ll learn to communicate and deal with people without continuously feeling disturbed about their ethics.
5. Show how white lies aren’t that bad
A person with high morals can’t ever lie. To them, that’s unforgivable. However, they lose sight of right and wrong and eventually become brutally honest. They lose the kind factor just to be truthful. Their words will sting others and most people will turn against them.
So, to deal with this aspect of their personality, introduce them to white lies. Suppose your lover asks you which outfit looks better on them… but you clearly don’t know how they are any different. But you rate one as better than the other anyway to avoid hurting them.
Share these situational examples when white lies can protect them and others. Of course, they mustn’t say something looks good on them even when it doesn’t. But occasional white lies will help them balance their life properly.
A word from ThePleasantPersonality
While dealing with either of the two type H personalities, remember that patience is your key. You can’t expect them to respond positively to the methods quickly. They’ll need time to understand why you’re so concerned about them.
Moreover, try to not jump in with too many steps at once or they might feel overwhelmed. Instead, take one step at a time, work it out, and you’ll deal with them better.
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...