- Enneagram 6s are trustworthy, loyal, intuitive, and responsible.
- They put all their energy into doubting, testing, and looking for double messages.
- Being a devil’s advocate, Enneagram 6s have a questioning mind that demands clarity.
- Hates being stuck in doubt and contrary thinking.
- They do everything to avoid being helpless and not in control in the face of danger.
Are you the one who is always dutiful and committed? Do you feel that the world is unpredictable and people cannot be trusted easily? Are double messages feel disturbing to you a lot?
Do others tend to count on you quite often? Are you always focused on the things that might go wrong? Let’s find out whether you are an enneagram 6.
Sixes prefer stability and security. You will never put your guard down. Sometimes you may cross-check every small piece of information that may come to you.
You will always remain concerned about what might happen and whether you have enough resources to deal with the issue. Thus, you are drawn towards skepticism.
Being six means you’re always cautious and careful. More to this, you’re responsible, devoted, alert, and always think about the greater good of the community.
As you may fear losing your support system, you’ll have a stronghold on intimate relationships. You will always remain committed, faithful, and loving towards your friends, family, and friends.
Knowing more about you would be interesting….
Enneagram 6 Personality Infographics
Enneagram 6 – meaning and personality description
People with enneagram 6 personalities are logical, detail-oriented, and dependable. Being dedicated and committed, these people are fiercely loyal, yet they are cautious and careful about the next move of others. The loyal skeptic seeks security and support, they follow the status quo without question.
Enneagram 6s are strong and secure yet they appear skeptical and doubtful always. They often use logic to figure things out. Sixes are analytical, reliable, and prefer a safe and secure life.
They remain committed to safeguarding themselves from harm and deceit. Sixes are alert and cautious. Thus, they can foresee trouble much ahead of others.
Being an enneagram 6, you will always follow the set rules of society. You are not the one to question rules, even if you know that it’s not worthy at all.
Nicknamed as a loyal skeptic, enneagram 6s are loyal, dependable, trustworthy, secure, and well-liked by others. On the other hand, they are cautious people who think rationally before deciding on anything.
You are suspicious because you think that the world is not a safe place and you may fall into deceit and malice. Thus, you want to keep yourself guarded and protected from all vice.
People with enneagram 6 are practical-minded and realistic. They may question each and every detail before trusting someone or something.
Their basic need is to attain safety and security in life. Usually, these people are thoughtful decision-makers.
Sometimes they tend to assume a worst-case scenario and can question their own ability to handle it or come out of it.
Skeptics are conventional and traditional. They are not flexible and prefer to follow rules and stick to routines. This is because they fear being abandoned, left out, and losing support from friends and family.
People with enneagram type 6 have a tendency to study every single detail of the situation before taking a call, just because they want to stay safe and hassle-free.
A safe environment makes them emotionally secure and mentally peaceful.
They are independent thinkers and never want to be controlled. But they may crumble if asked to take responsibility. At this time, the fear element may fill up their mind and they start to find ways to make themselves socially secure.
Sixes are conscious of their worries and anxieties. They want to build up a social support system around them, a backup to fall back upon in times of emotional highs.
Thus, their sense of safety and security is built on the backdrop of innate anxieties and fear. They keep their anxiety under control only by checking whether the immediate surrounding is free from threat.
What can you expect if you are an enneagram 6?
If you’re an enneagram 6, you can expect these things from yourself –
Being an enneagram 6, you will remain suspicious of the world around you. You may think the world is an unsafe place and thus you need to be strong and protect yourself from probable threats.
Your motto in life is to remain loyal and faithful towards fellow people while being cautious and careful.
You will armor yourself by having a strong network of friends and family who are trustworthy and honest. Like most sixes, you will be careful about whom you trust, because loyalty is important for you.
You will be committed and dutiful towards people and things you value. Moreover, you are alert and vigilant. Any minor problems or issues that may feel threatening to your emotional well-being can catch your attention quite early.
Being a six, you’ll try your best to minimize threats and risks around you by being prepared to face the adversities, if needed. Enneagram 6s are also good socialites.
They prefer to work in close collaboration with others. You also prefer cooperative group activities. It helps to build a trustworthy social circle that is guarded and out of harm’s way.
Being an enneagram six, you are prone to anxiety and worry, though at times you’ll also show courage to combat troubles. If anything goes wrong, you’ll be uncomfortable and thus want to remain prepared.
You will not trust others easily. People will have to prove their worth before you allow them to get closer to you. Your guards are always on because you have a tendency to imagine what can go wrong and how to deal with it.
Peace of mind is difficult to track down as your inner self is full of self-doubt and fear. Your problem is, you need others to feel secure, yet you do not trust them.
There will be a null and void relationship with others around you.
Enneagram 6 personality traits (Adjectives that describes you)
The personality traits that describe you are:
- Good friend
- Self-blaming tendencies
Enneagram 6 – Thinking pattern
Enneagram 6 is an analytical thinker. They approach life with a good thought. In order to safeguard themselves from threats, they double-check all the information that comes to them. These individuals never decide on haste.
Since they think in detail, they have the ability to scan through problems easily. Though they are good problem solvers, they remain skeptical about solutions that seem to be easy. They have a tendency to question the reliability of a solution.
The loyal skeptic is doubtful and suspicious. Thus, they have lots of unanswered questions in their mind. They seek security and want to feel safe. Any threat that appears damaging can either make them feel withdrawn or aggressive.
Their thought patterns go through a lot of dualities where they themselves are confused about what to do next.
In one way they are eager to know the obvious things and on the other hand, they also wish to know what’s going on behind the scenes. Sometimes, the hidden truths may make them feel vulnerable and anxious.
Enneagram 6 – Feeling pattern
Sixes are anxious and stressed out people. They have a tendency to think about the worst situations in life and whether they will be able to come out of it.
Sixes may feel mildly uneasy, anxious, or even go through dread, terror, and panic attacks.
Enneagram 6s are emotionally reactive. They can express their feelings of fear and concern openly. If they find that their present guard is not protective enough, they may change their coping strategy instantly.
Sixes can only feel happy and safe only when things go well in life. They are not the ones who can take stress easily. Their defenses may break off making them weak from within.
Since they never dwell on optimism, they also tend to project their innate fears onto others, doubting and second-guessing them for no obvious reason.
They project self-doubt externally just to buy peace for themselves. These people just want to negate the influence of threats in their life.
Enneagram 6 – Action pattern
Enneagram 6s are hard to pin down because they display opposing characteristics. In one way, these people are loyal, strong, and dependable.
Contrary to this, they’re doubtful, cautious, skeptical, and overly judgmental about everything in life. They take a lot of time trusting people and situations.
In order to understand the action patterns of enneagram 6, we will have to describe the two types of behavior that sixes manifest.
Basically, we see two types of enneagram 6 around us.
- The Phobic six
- The counterphobic six
The phobic sixes are those who are fearful, anxious, doubtful, insecure, and always behave like a worrywart. They are robbed of inner peace and happiness.
Gets busy seeing the dark side of life. The phobic six is less self-confident, skeptical, and prefers to stay in comfort zones, away from risks and threats.
The counter-phobic sixes are aggressive and try to dominate their surroundings by showing off that they are not fearful and afraid.
They face threats with courage and make their way out of the trouble. They seem to defy threats and go against authority.
These people are daredevils and can survive in uncertainty by being mentally strong and self-reliant.
Thus, enneagram 6 either tries to avoid threats or battle them out completely, in order to restore an inner balance of happiness and serenity.
10 Signs of being an Enneagram 6
If someone has ever told you that you are just too much with your sense of safety and security, and you are nothing more than a skeptic; be sure that you possess many signs of enneagram 6.
1. An enneagram six is fearful
Being a six, you are fearful and afraid of being abandoned and left alone in the crowd to suffer. Your perpetual fear stems from innate insecurities.
You are not confident to face the adversities. There is a feeling of self-doubt that makes you a scared being.
Being an enneagram 6, you may check the door lock many times whenever you go out of the house. You have a habit of double-checking things such as your wallet, mobile phone, etc.
There will be times when you may do things much ahead of time because you may fear getting delayed; for example – going to the airport 5 hours before the time or reaching a doctor’s clinic much before the scheduled appointment.
2. You have few trustworthy friends
People with enneagram type 6 have a small circle of friends who have been tried and tested many times.
They are loyal and you rely upon them in times of need. Sixes have problems trusting those people who may join their friend’s group recently.
You are not at all a people’s person though you prefer to mingle with others in social circles. Enneagram 6s work as individual contributors. They do not thrive in large groups and cannot be regarded as team players.
You are a loyal and faithful friend to those who are close to you. Others may come to you for help and advice because they know that you are too good at it.
3. Sixes do not trust others easily
People with enneagram 6 as a personality type are suspicious and skeptical about the intentions and whereabouts of others.
They never rely on others at face value. These people have trust issues because they desire to remain safe and sound always.
Sixes may do a lot of background checks of the person they meet or relate with. They get into the details of everything before trusting them fully.
Another notable thing that sixes do is, they never forget the wrongdoing of others. They may forgive but never forget.
Sixes never like to gossip or backbite. They do not like people who engage in such acts as well. Usually, they might take a long time opening up to others.
4. Sixes are loyal and faithful
Your fierce loyalty makes you a trustworthy person. Being six, you are a good friend and a guide. You will hold strongly to your intimate relationships.
You can even do many things to support and guide them. Enneagram sixes are the ones who can move mountains for the people who matter the most in their lives.
Sometimes you may still be in touch with your neighbor who has moved away from the locality long back. People with this personality type are patient listeners.
They can keep the secrets of their friends forever. Their loyalty is just unmatched. In the workplace also, you may be found to continue in the same job for many years. Thus you’re consistent as well.
5. Sixes love to control their immediate surroundings
You want to be safe always and thus remain prepared to face adversities as well. You may think that if you are able to control the space you’re in, you will also be able to control it easily.
Being an enneagram 6, you will see the table availability in your favorite restaurant before visiting there to dine out with family. Your plans are to be set beforehand otherwise you may become insecure from within.
It may feel like the situation no longer is in your grip. If you go for a long drive, you would prefer to be in the driver’s seat rather than resting behind. This sense of control over the situation gives you solace and peace.
6. Enneagram 6s are emotional and sentimental
Sixes are emotional and feel nostalgic of good things that happened in the past. They always try to hold on to past memories, whether good or bad.
This means that sixes will have a hard time letting go of things easily. They may feel trapped in agonies as well.
These people may put a sentimental value on inanimate objects such as a house, location, or a particular neighborhood. This makes them nostalgic and emotional.
Being an enneagram 6, you may not delete the contact details of old friends and colleagues. You may still have the gift given by your parents on your 18th birthday.
Your phone memory may show no more space available because you have never deleted a single-family pic.
In one way, you love to cherish all memories of your childhood and it makes you feel connected to all emotionally.
7. All sorts of listing and planning are meant for you
Being an enneagram 6, you will always prefer planning and organization. This makes you feel protected. You may think you are controlled by the situation also.
Sixes are the ones who never visit a provision store without a list in place. You will check the pricing of everything that you may pick up from the store rack.
Sometimes you may also use labels, stickers, post-it notes everywhere in the house so that you remember everything and nothing goes out of place.
Sixes love to organize the space they live in. Their house is compact and neat. It may look like a picture also.
Being an enneagram six, you prefer routines and schedules and will always stick to them. Sometimes you may seem to use a planner book to stay organized.
8. A spontaneous and easygoing lifestyle is not for you
As already discussed, you’re an organized person. You never like spontaneous actions, even if it’s for fun. You hate getting delayed for an event.
It’s likely that you will check with your friend every 10 minutes if they turn up late for dinner. You hate delays and never wish to wait for anyone or anything until absolutely necessary.
Sixes apologize if they are delayed for an appointment and they will do it many times.
You also hate waiting time and happen to be an extremely serious person. You may miss out on a party scheduled suddenly, only because you were not prepared.
9. Sixes tend to plan for the worst to make themselves mentally secure
You will plan for the worst happening, if at all any. This makes you feel safe and secure. Being an enneagram 6, you hate the last-minute rush and prefer to prepare yourself for anything that might happen.
You are the one who will inform someone either at home or in the office before going out. You want others to know where you are going so that they can remain informed.
Most of the time, you will have many backup plans foreseeing that if anything goes wrong, you can lean on something else. Your systematic mindset wants everything ready and done much before anything actually occurs in reality.
10. You’re a thoughtful decision maker
People with enneagram 6s are awesome decision-makers. They are logical and rational. Most of the time they see both the details and the bigger picture to understand the person or situation at hand.
These individuals never decide in haste. They use time-tested tools to decide slowly and patiently.
Enneagram 6 motivations
The core motivations are the finer driving forces of your type that enables you to think, feel, and act in certain ways. The motives actually rewire the way you are.
Enneagram 6s are motivated by an intrinsic need of being secure and safe. They wish to guard themselves against all evil things in life.
Sixes are always vigilant. They prefer to take steps much ahead of the occurrence of the problem as if they can foresee what might go wrong.
The core motivations make up your typical personality structure. It shows the ways of perception and understanding the world around you.
The core motivations of enneagram 6 are divided into
- Core desires
- Core fears or basic fears
Truly speaking, the core desires and core fears work in union. This means that you are doing something just to avoid doing something unfavorable.
The core desires of enneagram 6s are:
- Sixes are loyal and friendly to others because they want to feel secure and protected.
- They put a lot of effort into building trustworthy relationships.
- People with enneagram 6 type are motivated by their need for stability and safety.
- They seek reassurance from others as well.
- Sometimes, they wish to test others’ attitudes and behavior towards them.
- They also desire to guard themselves and others close to them from harm and deceit.
The core or basic fears of enneagram 6s are:
- They fear being left out or living without any support
- Sixes fear being alone. It makes them insecure about their worth.
- Since they seek guidance and assurance from others, they feel unsafe and unstable whenever they do not get it.
- They fear losing safe and predictable environments.
- These people dislike spontaneity and sudden changes. They may self-doubt about their ability to handle changes boldly.
- Fear of being unprepared and unguarded in trying times.
Core values of enneagram 6
The major values that guide enneagram type 6s behavior patterns are loyalty, faithfulness, trustworthiness, honesty, integrity, and perseverance.
The values are moral concerns or ethical guidelines that make you who you are and at the same time guide your life’s path towards righteous living.
Some of the core values of enneagram 6s are:
- Sixes are committed and trustworthy. They always remain thick and thin with those who matter the most in their lives.
- Enneagram type 6s has a sense of belongingness with others as they prefer to have balance and serenity in their relationships.
- They seek reassurance from others to build up their self-esteem. Enneagram sises prefer to feel important all the time.
- They trust people who have passed the test of time. So, skepticism works hand in hand with a sense of security.
- Sixes are peace-loving people. Sometimes they may also turn into a people pleaser just to maintain balance and avoid conflicts at all costs.
- Since they are loyal and faithful, they earn respect from others. People rely upon them in adverse situations.
- They are also good at keeping others’ privacy.
- These individuals are not risk takers and prefer a stable life.
- Since sixes are highly logical, they can go far and wide in thinking out the right strategy to deal with a problem. They plan for future adversities with their present resources.
Healthy and unhealthy behavior patterns of enneagram 6
The Enneagram model of personality typing describes nine interconnected personality types. Each of these nine types has distinct levels of functioning that are either healthy, unhealthy, or average.
This also means that these personality types are ever-changing. Personality is dynamic and one can change their thoughts, feelings, and actions according to the changing circumstances.
When acting healthy and moving in the direction of personal growth and prosperity, enneagram 6s may integrate and possess characteristic features like enneagram 9.
Thus, they may become more peaceful and serene. The growth arrows show that they have become relaxed, easygoing, and stable.
However, under the grip of stress, enneagram 6 breaks down and disintegrates. The stress arrow directs towards enneagram 3.
In this situation, sixes may display signs of competition and arrogance. They may self-doubt, think about worst scenarios that are not present in reality.
Moreover, they become skeptical and suspicious about the intentions of others around them.
Let us discuss further the characteristics of healthy, unhealthy, and average six in detail.
Healthy enneagram 6
Under a healthy growth process, enneagram 6s are loyal and committed, thoughtful, logical, generous, and helpful. They love to build trustworthy social connections around them.
Sixes are good team players. They can guide their colleagues and friends towards healthy growth. They are always prepared with their guards on to face the harsh realities of life.
Healthy sixes are hardworking. They take pride in their ability to serve others well. They are ready to hone their subtle skills to mingle well with fellow beings.
A healthy six is usually calm and composed. They never express anger and frustrations openly. Even under the grip of stress, healthy sixes know the way out and they just do what is needed at the moment.
Signs of healthy 6s
Some of the signs of healthy sixes are:
- They become trusting of themselves and others.
- Possesses good self-confidence
- They may affirm their worth well.
- Healthy sixes believe in cooperation and collaboration.
- They are courageous.
- Has good leadership abilities.
- They are appealing and lovable in front of others.
- A healthy six can bond well with others and believes in long term trustworthy relationships
- These sixes are positive thinkers.
- They need to feel safe and protected all the time.
- Dedicated to people who are loyal and faithful just like them.
- These sixes are great community builders since they know how to bring people and processes together.
- Healthy sixes are responsible and others rely on them whole-heartedly.
Unhealthy enneagram 6
An unhealthy enneagram six may become suspicious of people and situations. This happens because they feel that the world is full of unscrupulous people who might harm them in some way.
They fear off-guard and think that foreseeing problems beforehand may help them to overcome the issues and live a happy and peaceful life.
An unhealthy six is always fearful and insecure. They tend to see problems everywhere and develop quick trust issues. Sometimes they are hyper-vigilant and start thinking about the worst scenarios.
The source of threat can either be real or imagined. Most often they get bothered with a thought of whether they will be able to deal with the problem. Unhealthy sixes are less confident and doubtful about themselves.
They may feel insecure and unprotected if they feel the situation is uncontrolled and they cannot do much to avert the problem.
Sometimes they may suspect that others are trying to harm them or fool them in some way. This causes trust issues and sixes can double-check everything before giving a nod to it.
Signs of unhealthy 6s
The unhealthy six looks like this:
- Doubtful of self and others.
- They may feel inferior, panic attacks can make them feel numb from within.
- Negative thoughts and anticipatory anxiety are common.
- Feels defenseless and helpless.
- Irrational thoughts, fear, and vulnerability are apparent.
- They may think others are trying to harm them in some way or the other.
- Unhealthy social relationships based on mistrust and doubt may crop up.
- Self-destructive habits such as alcoholism, drug abuse, smoking, gambling may start to dominate their life.
- They feel persecuted for no obvious reason.
Average enneagram 6
The average enneagram 6 is highly suspicious. Their motto in life is to always feel secure and protected. They never like to feel defenseless. These people are loyal because they always prefer to remain in the good books of others.
The average 6 is aware of their blind spots and will take necessary steps to overcome them. These people may suffer from low self-esteem from time to time.
To guard themselves against the worst happenings, they remain prepared before carrying out any task.
These sixes are always ready to face the situation boldly. They may cross-check everything, double guess the meaning of every small piece of information that comes to them for better clarity.
Sometimes their tendency to over-analyze everything can make them more anxious and restless. More skepticism may take a toll on their mental health.
Signs of average 6
Some of the typical signs of average sixes are:
- Invest energy in protecting themselves from harm.
- Tries to build a secure and safe life.
- Remains in self-doubt unless success is achieved.
- Shows doubt and suspicion towards the intentions and actions of others.
- There is loss of mental peace because they are always vigilant of what may happen next.
- They are highly fearful, anxious, and reactive individuals.
- Inner confusion, fear, worries, insecurity dominates their behavior.
- Has a tendency to anticipate issues and problems, either real or imagined
- Compromises peace of mind by being skeptical all the time.
- The average enneagram 6 can blame others for their problems.
- They show mixed feelings of stability and confusion.
Enneagram type 6 wings
This means that if you have enneagram 6 as your main personality type, you will have enneagram 5 (6w5) and enneagram 7 (6w7) as your wings.
It is considered that your main personality type is determined by your core enneagram number. However, the two wings on either side of the main type either complement or contradict the signs of the main type.
At times, you may swing or toggle between the wings and the main type depending upon your behavior pattern and the life circumstances you are in. These wings are the second side of your primary enneagram number.
Enneagram 6 wing 7 characteristics
This enneagram type six-wing possesses all the characteristics that resemble the 6 types but also has some traits of enneagram 7 as well.
These personality types are socially engaged, helpful, and can become the close confidants of others. The core desire of this type is to feel secure and safe and as such, they form close ties with people around them.
6w7 are committed and faithful. They guard themselves against pain and suffering by projecting their feelings on others. Sometimes this may lead to toxic social relationships where the other person may feel emotionally abused and humiliated.
- 6w7s are friendly and compassionate.
- They prefer social ties and remain connected with many people.
- Their principle motive is to feel secure, away from emotional harm.
- These individuals are afraid of losing safety in life.
- They need to be reassured constantly that they are worthy and good enough.
- For them, reliable and trustworthy relationships are the basis of good living.
- Prefers to honor commitments.
- Hardworking and dedicated towards a social cause.
- Cannot reconcile pains and sufferings.
- Too concerned with material possessions in life.
- Has a tendency to doubt self and blame others for things going wrong
Enneagram 6 wing 5 characteristics
This wing of enneagram 6 is keen on building safe networks around them, so as to feel protected. 6 wing 5 has most of the traits of enneagram 6 and a few traits like enneagram 5.
This type is independent and prefers autonomy. They do not like to be restricted either.
6w5s are less sociable, intellectual, and loyal than the other type. Sixes with a five wing are serious and focused. They fear losing a stable life and as such, they are highly skeptical and suspicious of their immediate surroundings.
- They seek help and guidance from people who are close to them.
- 6w5s are logical thinkers.
- They often have many backup plans to ensure they are safe and sound.
- These people never decide in haste.
- They focus on specifics and analyze the big picture as well.
- 6w5s have a tendency to isolate themselves from social situations that are threatening and can rob their inner peace.
- They are less emotionally expressive.
- There is a whirlpool of negative thoughts in them that makes them foresee the worst scenarios, often imaginary and disturbing.
- Emotionally aloof, detached, and unapproachable.
Enneagram type 6 subtypes
The Enneagram personality model describes three subtypes for all the nine personality types described under this typology system.
The subtypes are formed by your core enneagram number and your instincts. Instincts refer to body-based primal tendencies of a person that is always present inside. It manifests itself in different ways depending upon the life situation you are in.
Thus the subtypes of enneagram 6s could be categorized as:
- Self-preservation (SP) – Warmth
- Social (SO) – Duty
- Sexual or one-to one (SX) – Intimidation
1. Self-preservation (SP)
This subtype of six is cautious and careful. They safeguard themselves from all sorts of problems by anticipating what might happen in the future.
The self-preserved type of enneagram 6 is insecure and thus tries to build strong social connections.
They prefer to lean on their loved ones to feel protected and secure during hard times. These people are warm, kind, and empathetic.
This subtype avoids conflict, never shares their opinion because they fear being abandoned or left alone.
2. Social (SO)
The social sixes are helpful and compassionate. They are emotionally sensitive towards the needs of others. Thus, they become good community workers.
They can stand up for justice. This subtype is careful and hardly makes mistakes. They are logical-minded and deeply thoughtful.
3. Sexual or one-to-one (SX)
This subtype of sixes is assertive, brave, and intelligent. Sometimes they appear highly intimidating and may get confused with enneagram 8.
The sexual subtype of sixes is counterphobic. They face dangers boldly and never shy away in fear.
These sixes never fall into the trap of insecurity and vulnerability. They face all sorts of struggles by being rebellious.
Enneagram type 6 relationships
People need to play and maintain different kinds of relationships in their lifetime. Until now, we have talked of several aspects linked with people of Enneagram 6 personality type.
They have helped us develop a fair understanding of this Enneagram personality.
It is time to discuss how these people maintain the following relationships in their life –
As a partner or spouse
When an Enneagram 6 personality type individual is in a relationship with their spouse, he would be practical in their approach. They happen to be loyal partners.
It is especially when they have someone carrying a lot more ideologies and happen to be free-spirited than them.
They would always want to go beyond to offer support and meet their needs. These people try to solve issues for their partners.
An Enneagram 6 will fight for their relationship even during difficult times. Therefore, they mustn’t break the trust of this Enneagram type.
These individuals are most likely to stand by their spouse or partner even when it feels like giving up and moving ahead in life.
Sixes are highly reliable for their better halves and would always stay by their side in times of need. Their partner or spouse must ensure to give them the value they deserve.
Even though they are loyal and always wish to give rather than take, Enneagram 6s aren’t the most emotional people.
Their basic desire is to feel secure. In their attempt to stay prepared for all possible scenarios, giving too much value to security can make things difficult for them in relationships.
They always look for a partner who would respect them and listen to what they say. It is particularly applicable when they have to confront an unfavorable situation.
These people yearn for solid support, which they can count on every single moment of their relationship.
An optimistic approach is one of the main requirements that an Enneagram 6’s partner should meet, along with a sense of positivity.
Their partner must possess a great sense of humor in their personality. They also look for a partner who would remain present and stay by their side right through.
As a friend
When an Enneagram 6 plays the role of a friend, he helps to bring steady reliability in friendship and a sense of humor. People of this personality type long for loyal friends and worry a lot about their relationship status.
They appreciate all those friends who reassure them of the value they possess. Even though it might seem a bit odd, Sixes love it when they receive regular reminders that they have good terms with their friends.
These individuals very often lose sleep for committing minor mistakes and curse themselves over trivial issues.
It is common for Enneagram 6s to worry that their fault has resulted in ruining the friendship. One of their essential requirements in being friends with these individuals is trust.
Sixes prefer to have all their cards on the table. They even want to see all their friends’ cards on the table as well.
These individuals need to be sure of what they are dealing with and do not want to get caught unaware. For Sixes, authenticity plays a vital role.
This Enneagram personality type feels that if friendship is not authentic, trust cannot exist. Trust is of great importance for anyone to forge a relationship with six.
A friendly relationship with an Enneagram 6 person can thrive if the other person is straightforward and open.
An Enneagram 6 feels overwhelmed from time to time by the worst-case scenarios. Under these circumstances, they must have a friend who encourages them to talk about their basic fears.
Their friends should make them realize that even under adverse life conditions, they will still have options.
As a parent
As a parent, Enneagram 6s are supportive and compassionate towards their children. They always look to protect children from any kind of harm.
Hence, their kids feel safe and know they have someone to fall back on.
At times, Sixes can even go overboard in their attempt to protect. Due to this reason, children might feel smothered.
Their over-protective nature can make them resist letting babysitters or nannies take care of their children.
An Enneagram 6 parent is dependable, works hard, and has the natural tendency towards parenthood.
They not only protect their children but also stay prepared to tackle any contingency. These individuals always stand up for their kids.
When someone of Enneagram 6 personality type acts as a parent, he would have a sense of caution working within them for their kids.
It allows their children to feel safe. It is good to protect and support your kids. Still, the Sixes must let them take risks as well.
It is also necessary that the kids get hurt sometimes. Therefore, the Enneagram 6 parents should allow their little ones to take chances without worrying too much about failure or suffering from scraped knees.
Letting your children take risks would not only make them mentally as well as physically strong but would also prepare them to face the battles of life.
Moreover, confronting tight situations and overcoming them on their own would allow Enneagram 6s children to discover their inner strength.
Enneagram 6 compatibility with other types
Let us see how Enneagram 6 personality type individuals react while moving in relationships with other Enneagram types.
The following compatibility chart would give us a better understanding of this type’s compatibility with the other enneagram types.
|Enneagram Types||When Paired With 6|
When an Enneagram One pairs up with an Enneagram Six, it turns out to be a fun couple. They share similar belief systems concerning loyalty and goodness regarding what they think is right. Both these individuals love executing their plans.
The pair uses their logic and carries out their duties responsibly. They not only love but also serve their family and friends. Amidst all the planning for their life to go with their groups and people, they must remember not to leave any room for emotional and physical connection regularly. Moreover, when either individual gets angry, the other person should repair and get things back to normal.
The pairing of Enneagram Two with Six happens to be the strongest among all other types. It combines the loyalty and a secure love of the Enneagram Six with the affectionate and romantic love of the Two. They enjoy leading their life together and make sure to express love by supporting one another in a faithful way even while going through turbulent times.
The couple even does the same thing to all communities, and people, especially those to whom they show loyalty. Thus they make sure to care for and help out every individual. Under those circumstances, when they seem to get out of balance, Six’s reactivity can hurt Enneagram Two, while Two’s outer focus can make Enneagram Six jealous.
The relationship of personality Type Three with Personality Type Six is honesty. They put in hard work not only for themselves but also to get acceptance and approval from one another. The couple enjoys building new paths together. They are a sensitive couple. Still, it will not come out in the open as they can operate from practical points of view. It is while showcasing love and affection not only at home but also in the whole world.
This pair tends to glow further when both Enneagram Three and Enneagram Six feel unconditional love and safety in each other’s company. They tend to feel as if they can accomplish just about anything when they are together.
This type combination of Enneagram six and enneagram 4 involves a lot of security and depth. Neither individual is shy to analyze and explore the relationship to ensure that they are at their best. They feel the need to belong to a community that understands, offers support and accepts them in unique ways. Thus it enables them to make the connection long-lasting. Both individuals are always on the lookout for their people, even though they pride themselves on their sensible approach.
They can take a rest; enjoy the sweet connection and loyalty that this couple experiences in the deep comfort of one another while allowing the world to pass by. This pair tends to get emotional and reactive. Thus, when any situation becomes a little intense, and the two individuals start to move away too much from the world, the couple requires communication assistance.
The Type Five and Type Six couple form a relationship between loyal and intellectual lovers. They love to unwind in their private space and indulge in conversations involving a lot of humor, apart from warm consideration and close cuddles. Both these types are very considerate about their work, moral values, and family. The couple enjoys working out their vivid ideas together.
As the Six tends to find comfort in social circles, while the Five need to spend some time alone, the couple will require good soulful communication to balance their strong will for security and rest. When they find ways to have effective communication, this couple will find safe confinements in the presence of one another.
When the Sixes form a couple, they give immense value to each other’s safety and security. The relationship develops into a passionate bond to serve themselves and the world with utmost efficiency, trustworthiness, and care.
Enneagram Sixes Type goes through a period of stabilization in relationships. It leads to the formation of deep trust. Both the individuals can discuss what exactly makes one another feel safe. They also tend to understand the kind of reaction that can crop up when either individual feels a lack of trust momentarily.
As the relationship matures with time, it grows. It contains a sense of excitement because that is when the couple can give not just because of fabulous, fully prepared, and troubleshooting mindsets but also from a position of joy and rest. It is indeed a special gift for all individuals.
The pair of enneagram 7 with Type Six forms a formidable couple that glows with loyalty and laughter. Their love shines brightly all across the world. This couple wants to remain cozy and safe. They even intend to explore numerous intriguing adventures. Six’s planning and preparation, mixed with the Seven’s carefree and expansive approach, helps balance one another out.
Both these individuals deal with anxiety. Hence, they must form an understanding whenever either person needs to take care of their needs. Moreover, both Six and Seven should learn to open up their feelings to each other by engaging in healthy communication.
When an enneagram 8 pairs with a Type Six, they portray a unique liking for loyalty and love. It is tough to find when other pairs gel with one another. They have a mentality to stand up against the world, especially in their zeal to protect the innocent from any kind of evil.
The couple stands up as loyal friends for all those who are hurt. They move ahead to lead workplaces by bringing order, innovation, and troubleshooting. Together they build trust to back one another from all possible angles. If either individual feels a lack of faith or resistance to their requirements, they tend to get quite reactive.
A couple of enneagram 9 and enneagram 6 will have numerous things in common. Both these individuals have a love for chilling out at home, maintaining a balanced routine, and ticking all the boxes at work, so that they can take proper rest when they unwind and relax. Even though they have the gift of rest, this pair can get down to business when they report to their workplace. One cannot find this for any other Enneagram pair.
Type Nine helps to bring forth relaxation to the usually neurotic Type Six. While, on the other hand, Type Six gives Type Nine the courage to express their voice in the whole world. When the Six lets Nine grow independently while the Nine comprehends the logical steps for Six to find their comfort and security, the couple starts to gel well.
Dating tips for enneagram 6
For an enneagram type 6, relationships are forever. They prefer to have committed and trustworthy partners in their life. Loyalty comes first to them.
If you are trying to relate with an enneagram 6 or dating someone and looking for long-term emotional connections, be sure to move through a journey with someone who is poles apart from you at times. Enneagram sixes are full of contradictions.
They may always show a dual perspective about everything in life. Being a cynical type, they may not trust you easily. You may have to pass through several tests and trials, several times to get a place in their hearts.
Some of the tips that you can use to befriend them could be:
- Be loyal and faithful towards them. They like it.
- Enneagram 6s thrive on commitments. Thus, learn to keep your promises and respect your word of mouth.
- They hate to be kept waiting for a long time. Thus, be on time.
- Sixes want stability and security. Provide them with the emotional hug that they need. You will be in sync with their preferences.
- Do not rush with things when you’re dealing with an enneagram 6. Give them enough time because they may take a long time to open up and connect with you.
- Enneagram 6s are workaholics. You can be sure that they will miss out on dates or may not turn up for a family function. You need to just accept this as a part of life.
- Never blame them for anything. They may become extremely insecure and scared.
- Sixes may cross check everything. You need to tolerate this habit if you really wish to connect with them.
- The loyal skeptics are anxious. You need to reassure them that they are good enough and confident beings.
- Never invalidate them by saying that they are wrong. Since they are not used to being criticized, they may try to loosen the connection with you.
- Just appreciate who they are and see the magic of love and loyalty that gets cooked up in the relationship. Committed relationships are their greatest strength.
Enneagram 6 workplace habits
We have so far discussed how an Enneagram 6 personality type individual maintains different kinds of relationships.
Moreover, with the help of a compatibility chart, we have also seen how compatible they are when compared with other Enneagram types.
It is time to see how these individuals behave when they are moving to undertake different responsibilities at the workplace.
Enneagram 6s are organized, can work well in teams, and carry out their duties in the best possible manner.
Let us now discuss what an individual of Enneagram 6 personality type brings to the table while working in different positions at a workplace –
As a colleague
Enneagram 6s happen to be loyal teammates. They take their privacy very seriously and do not mind working overtime to offer support to their team for completing any task.
Most importantly, having this kind of person in a group can ensure harmony as they always speak well of most people.
These individuals not only work but also bring forth unity within teams by creating proper structure and safety.
Most importantly, you can always rely on an Enneagram 6 to anticipate problems and offer their advice in creating solutions.
An individual of Enneagram 6 personality type must be among colleagues who would put in a similar level of commitment and work with dedication as they do.
Otherwise, Enneagram 6s tend to become skeptical of their teammates’ loyalty.
As a subordinate
When Enneagram 6 works as a subordinate in an office, they feel energized when they feel safe and supported by their boss and colleagues.
This individual always wants their boss to trust him and appreciate whatever input he gives as part of his contribution to the job.
Enneagram 6 personality type subordinates would hate work in an environment that makes them feel unstable.
They need the work environment in an office to be consistent, as it would help them stay motivated and perform better.
Due to their excellent communication skill, Sixes can express their needs eloquently in front of their seniors.
These individuals cannot stand if their boss criticizes their inputs. Enneagram 6 subordinates look for respect and admiration, or else they tend to feel completely drained out at work.
Although, they can use their humor, self-depreciation, and charm to make light of any serious situation.
As a manager
Usually, Enneagram 6s do not prefer to take up leadership or managerial positions. Despite their reluctance, they have the courage and will to take responsibility for the work they need to carry out.
They take pleasure when their subordinates take active cooperation in dealing with any task. These individuals have unique qualities of planning and researching.
They are always ready with their backup plans in case their initial plan does not work out. While working as a manager in an office, this Enneagram personality type always anticipates where things can go wrong.
They are intellectually curious people, very good at resolving issues and in making plans for the future. Type 6 managers always want to feel safe and have a sense of security.
It is not only applicable for them but also to the whole team. They always take care of the team and support each individual. Hence, employees like these managers a lot.
Enneagram 6 career choices
People of Enneagram 6 personality type are loyalists. They tend to prioritize responsibility, stability, and commitment in their careers.
Sixes are hardworking individuals and give immense value to support and security more than anything else.
At work, they bring forth qualities and skills in their level of commitment, understanding, responsibility, and care.
Enneagram 6s are likely to flourish in those careers that offer several progression opportunities.
In addition to these, they feel motivated by offering and receiving security. Moreover, the motivation level goes up further when these individuals come across trustworthy people who maintain consistency.
At work, these people become energetic when they start feeling supported, appreciated, and connected.
Now, considering all the aspects mentioned above, let us now see the list of career choices that are ideally suited for Enneagram 6s –
- Police Officer
- Environmental Specialists
- Security Guard
Core strengths of enneagram 6s
Each individual, irrespective of his personality type, possesses strengths to lead his life better. One can always focus on strengths to come out of tight situations and sail through their life.
It is applicable even for those with the Enneagram 6 personality type. Let us discuss some of the core strengths that help them to lead happy and fruitful lives.
1. Focus on making responsible and practical choices
Enneagram 6 personality type people are very well-organized individuals. They see life from practical points of view.
These people are particular about making practical choices and taking responsibility for their actions. Due to this reason, they are well-liked by others.
2. They honor their commitments.
People of Enneagram 6 personality type always make sure to honor their commitments to plans and people.
If they promise someone or plan to do something, one can rest assured that the Sixes would never disregard them and will anyhow meet their commitments. Therefore a person of Enneagram 6 personality is a man of words.
3. Offer care and protection for others.
Enneagram 6 people are loyal individuals, and they always look to protect their loved ones from any problem in life.
They are empathetic, always try to put themselves in others’ shoes, and care to meet people’s needs and demands.
4. Recognizes people’s perspectives
In these times, it is difficult to find people who always think from others’ perspectives and act accordingly. Fortunately, Enneagram 6 personality type individuals fall in that category.
Their caring attitude allows them to identify and think about issues from another person’s point of view, considering both emotional and logical angles.
Core pitfalls/blind spots of enneagram 6s
No one in this world is perfect. Therefore, people are bound to have certain blind spots or weaknesses in their personalities. It is applicable for Enneagram 6s as well. The blind spots act as hurdles in one’s path to success.
Thus, one must recognize their weaknesses, work on them and convert them into strengths to attain success in personal and professional lives.
Following are some of the potential trouble spots or issues in this Enneagram personality type –
1. Face problems in controlling their anxiety
Anxiety is one of the major issues that bother an Enneagram 6. It often leads them to suffer from stress and tension.
They always feel as if something negative will happen, hence having problems controlling their anxiety.
2. Delay in taking crucial decisions out of fear.
Another issue that Enneagram 6s have is that they often allow their fears to guide them in their life.
Due to this reason, they delay taking important decisions and hence adversely affect their personal and professional lives.
3. Plagued by insecurity and self-doubt
It is always imperative for any individual to portray confidence while dealing with situations in daily life. Unfortunately, self-doubt and insecurity tend to plague Enneagram 6s.
They fail to realize their potential and hence start doubting their self-confidence to achieve something big in life.
Stress triggers of Enneagram 6
Stress is anything that makes people feel overwhelmed. It occurs when we are unable to tackle mental or emotional pressure.
Every individual goes through stress and tension in their lifetime, but the triggers differ from one person to another.
It is applicable for people of Enneagram 6 personality type as well. They come under stress from facing some of the worst-case scenarios in their lives.
Following are some of their stress triggers –
1. When they come across unreliable people
Enneagram 6s are loyal, and people can rely on them in times of need. They always put themselves in others’ shoes and think from their perspectives. Hence, they also make sure to stay among reliable individuals.
Now, when circumstances force them to face or come across unreliable, unfaithful people, Enneagram 6s come under stress and pressure.
2. Negativity surrounds their environment
Enneagram 6s frequently think as if something untoward is going to happen. They even doubt their abilities. Despite these negative traits, still, they look for positive vibes in and around themselves.
People of this personality type cannot stand negative people and always look to stay away from them as they cause a lot of stress to an Enneagram 6.
3. Sensing as if they are not needed
Others must make Enneagram 6s feel important. Whether in personal or professional life, if one pays heed to their suggestions and acts accordingly, they become happy.
Now, not everything can go as per plan. Therefore, under those circumstances, when people do not give too much importance to an Enneagram 6 and go ahead doing what they feel like, this personality type person would feel as if they are not required.
It would make them suffer from stress.
4. Making inappropriate decisions
In life, each individual reacts to situations and makes decisions accordingly, but not every time decisions turn out to be ideal for specific scenarios.
In this respect, Enneagram 6s feel the need to make the right decisions at the right time. Whenever they make any inappropriate decision that results in chaos and discomfort, it results in stress.
How do they handle stress?
Stress is never a good thing for any individual, irrespective of their personality type. It leads to people doing stuff, which they otherwise won’t do.
Thus, it is necessary to de-stress and relax. People of different personalities adopt various ways to come out of stress and lead their lives peacefully.
Similarly, Enneagram 6 people also have specific ways to handle stress and recover in an ideal manner.
Let us now look into the techniques that these individuals adapt to de-stress –
- An Enneagram 6 can stay in the present and not get agitated by worrying about the future.
- During times of stress, they must get back to gratitude.
- Try to focus on all those things you are thankful for in your life.
- It is necessary to dwell on what is genuine and dependable.
- Their close ones can remind them that the worst could happen in life, but the best is always round the corner.
- They can simply follow through on their promises and commitments.
- Deep breathing exercises can help these individuals in relieving stress.
- Friends and relatives can help them assess their physical requirements.
- People close to an Enneagram 6 individual can help calm down internal voices in his mind. They can encourage him to listen to what their heart says.
- It is necessary to ensure that they are getting sufficient time to spend alone.
- Assist them in canceling all the non-essential duties and responsibilities, which seem to have an overwhelming effect on them.
Famous persons with enneagram 6
Apart from people like you and me, several famous personalities possess the personality type of Enneagram 6. It will be interesting to see those renowned people whom we must have adored for the work they have put in over the years.
Following are some of the authority figures with this Enneagram personality –
- Ben Affleck, American Actor
- Johnny Carson, American Television Host, Writer and Comedian
- Joe Biden, President of the United States
- Princess Diana, Former Princess of Wales
- Tom Hanks, American Actor and Filmmaker
- Bear Grylls, British Adventurer
- Daniel Craig, English Actor
- Jennifer Aniston, American Actress
- Marilyn Monroe, American Actress, Model and Singer
- David Letterman, American Television Host
- Mark Twain, American Writer
What enneagram 6s hate?
There are many things that people hate in their personal and professional lives. Let us discuss them in brief –
- They hate laziness and all those people who are lazy.
- Enneagram 6 people always focus on being responsible. Hence, irresponsible behavior irritates them.
- These individuals do not like unfair acts.
- People of this personality type hate dishonesty.
- When there is a feeling as if they are unable to get things accomplished.
- As they are extremely punctual, Enneagram 6s hate lateness.
- An Enneagram 6 hates when they do not get sufficient time to relax.
- These people hate to repress their anger for a long time.
- They get irritated and hate all those who do not appreciate Enneagram 6s for their help.
- When there is a feeling as if they are not good enough.
- They hate getting burdened by too many responsibilities.
Hobbies of enneagram 6
Every individual likes to spend their leisure hours productively. They can indulge in different activities of their choice, which allow them to relax and unwind.
People of different personalities have specific hobbies, which help them enjoy their leisure time. The same goes for Enneagram 6 personality type individuals.
As they are loyalists, they would do anything that feels the best for them. They would be doing it comfortably. It is because they always want to stay in their comfort zone.
Keeping this in mind, let us look at some of their popular hobbies –
- Spend time by reading books or articles
- They can indulge in writing about any particular topic.
- Play a musical instrument.
- Create artwork of their choice.
- These individuals can even volunteer themselves and work for a non-profit organization.
- They love to solve puzzles.
- Prefers getting into brainstorming sessions
How rare are the enneagram 6s?
Growth tips for enneagram 6s (How do you grow better)
Being an enneagram 6, you need to understand the basic motives that make you behave the way you do. Primarily, you wish for a safe, secure, and comfortable life.
The various life issues and emotional stress can make you awry at any moment. You may not be clear about your ability to deal with them.
This makes you suspicious about the intentions of others. In the same way, you’re cynical about your self-confidence and worth as well.
Your personal growth plan should be based on your strengths and pitfalls. You need to overcome your weaknesses and turn them into strengths.
Some of the self-help tips could be:
- You need to act against your fear by stopping your negative thoughts.
- The intrusive thoughts can be eliminated by reframing them in positive ways.
- Stop being skeptical about everything in life. Learn to be relaxed and easygoing at times. Not everything is really wrong out there.
- Your habit of cross-checking is just a compulsive tendency to feel safe and secure. Thus, you can visit a professional for appropriate coping strategies.
- Learn to let go of things that are not really necessary in your life.
- Value your relationships because they are your real strengths.
- Do not end up being a dependent person on your loved ones. You need to stop seeking approval.
- Remember that you’re good enough in yourself. Your loyalty and truthfulness is unmatched. This is enough to make you a strong person.
- There is an unknown anxiety that keeps bothering the six now and then. Being a partner, you should engage them in positive self-talk. Participate in some shared fun-loving activities that both of you like doing.
- Make them feel psychologically safe with you. They will go a long way to build committed relationships.
Enneagram personality test
The Riso-Hudson Enneagram Type Indicator, commonly referred to as the RHETI version 2.5, is the best enneagram test used everywhere in the world.
This test is an easy-to-use system with 144 paired statements that are empirically tested and validated.
It indicates the two corresponding wings of your core enneagram number. It often describes your relative relationship with all the nine personality types shown in the enneagram model.
If you wish to know your core enneagram number, you may take the test here.
The video link shared below shows the various signs of an enneagram 6. Do check out.
Parting words from ‘ThePleasantPersonality’
As the name suggests, skeptics are organized and systematic. They step out with caution and vigilance all the time. Their worldview is full of doubts and cynicism with a motive to keep themselves secure and protected all the time.
Enneagram type 6 is rational and practical. They are loyal, caring, and protective towards their loved ones. They can move mountains and sail through the deep sea to safeguard the people who matter most in their lives.
These wonderful folks are noble hearts with a touch of insecurity and vulnerability in them. For them, family and close friends are an integral part of their life. They just cannot let them go.
Their nature is actually paradoxical. They are the ones who always oscillate between strength and fear, doubt and certainty, good and evil. Actually, they are full of opposites, difficult to be understood as always.
“The future belongs to those who prepare for it today.”Malcolm X
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Chandrani is a former school psychologist and teacher by profession. She is a post graduate in Applied psychology with focus in clinical and health domains. Her passion for writing, kindled during school days have now become a full time freelancing endeavor. For her, writing is cathartic and keeps her mentally agile. Her lovable niches includes psychology, parenting, spirituality, lifestyle, and love and relationships. Her work depicts her perspectives about various experiences that she came across; unleashed a richer and deeper meaning of life. "Let me leave an aftertaste in the minds of few, if not many who need to find a path of absolute bliss, happiness, and inner peace."