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A Detailed Overview of ESFJ Personality Type – The Loyal Helper

A Detailed Overview of ESFJ Personality Type – The Loyal HelperUpdated on November 30, 2021 | Published on October 27, 2021
Reviewed by Dr. Nereida Gonzalez-Berrios, MD, Certified Psychiatrist

Overview of ESFJ Personality Type – The Loyal Helper

Do you always intend to help others? Are you sensitive to others’ needs? Do you always dedicate yourself to their responsibilities? Then, you must belong to the ESFJ personality type.

You love to be around an environment that offers a sense of harmony and cooperation. As an individual, you are always eagerly looking to please and give whatever you have in your kitty.

Given your ability to give value to tradition and loyalty, you impose a lot of priority on friends and family members. 

You show generosity in terms of effort, time, and emotions. You must take care of others’ concerns and treat them as if they are your own. 

These individuals will make every single attempt to use their organizational talents and bring proper order to others’ lives.

Summary in Infographics

ESFJ Personality Meaning & Signs
ESFJ Personality Meaning & Signs
ESFJ Personality Strengths, Weaknesses & Hobbies
ESFJ Personality Strengths, Weaknesses & Hobbies

ESFJ – Meaning and personality type (Consul Personality type)

SUMMARY
ESFJ stands for Extraverted, Sensing, Feeling, and Judging type of personality. They are serious while carrying out their responsibilities to offer help and perform the right thing. Otherwise known as Consuls, they base their moral codes on established laws and traditions.

ESFJs need to realize that people belong to different backgrounds. Therefore, each individual has different opinions about others and the world at large. What might seem right to people with this personality type is not always the truth. 

These people love offering their service in some way or the other to others. They are the pioneers of community building. Armed with warmth, kindness, and a genuine urge to help others, these people never step back when it comes to supporting those people who are in need.

They would love to get any role that lets them contribute in a meaningful manner. It is as long as ESFJs realize that others value and appreciate them. 

These personality type individuals have great respect for hierarchy and try their level best to be in charge. 

It helps them to keep everything stable, clear, and well organized for everyone. The supportive and outgoing nature allows them to find sufficient time to get into discussions and chill out with everyone.

ESFJs enjoy listening to different activities and relationships of their friends. They take note of minute details and are always ready to discuss matters with a sense of warmth and sensitivity. 

If something is not right, these individuals sense it and look to restore stability and harmony in the group.  They put a lot of energy into establishing social order. ESFJs prefer being part of planned events to get-togethers that happen all of a sudden.

ESFJ personality type people put a tremendous amount of effort into those activities that they have arranged themselves. If people have no interest or reject their ideas and suggestions, they feel hurt. ESFJs need to understand that every individual has their own set of choices.

The biggest challenge for ESFJs is to accept their sensitivity. They should understand that people would not agree with everything that an ESFJ says or does. There is going to be criticism. Even though it hurts, one must always take it as a part of life.

Ideally, people with this personality type must concentrate on doing what they do best. Their sole focus should be on becoming role models and taking care of people and work.

Rather than getting upset over people criticizing them, ESFJs must take heart from the fact that some people appreciate them a lot for the efforts they put in. Consul personality people always look for cooperation and harmony. They feel that one can accomplish it only when others follow a similar set of rules.

ESFJs have a typical sense of order in how people relate to each other. Hence, they often accept roles that let them put the social order into effect. These individuals act responsibly to meet others’ needs. They usually become eager to involve themselves in helping people out.

ESFJ typology description

Let us now see what the ESFJ acronym means:

1. Extroversion – ESFJs love to be around people. They have a keen interest in people and study their behavioral patterns. These individuals do not like to spend their time alone. Thus, active involvement in activities and events with social interaction helps them derive maximum energy. They enjoy going beyond their limits and doing more than their capability.

2. Sensing – ESFJs have their focus on the facts of life. They always tend to base their decisions on things that they manage to assess on their own. These people are particular with anything they do and simply do not go by their beliefs. 

3. Feeling – ESFJ personality type people would always go by their emotions and hearts. They are not only caring in nature but also warm-hearted and compassionate. These individuals can be very protective of those people they care for and love. 

4. Judging – If you are of the ESFJ personality type, you will feel comfortable when the road ahead is fixed. You would not want to take any event as it comes but rather prefer having backup plans in place. These individuals prefer to have clarity and proper closure. They would like to stick to a set plan rather than going with the flow.

ESFJ personality traits

Following are some of the typical traits belonging to individuals of ESFJ personality type:

  • Trustworthy
  • Practical
  • Thorough and thoughtful
  • Energetic
  • Outgoing
  • Loyal
  • Organized
  • Friendly
  • Fun-loving
  • Sympathetic to others
  • Kind
  • Dependable
  • Likes to help people
  • Maintains order
  • Focus on resolving tussles
  • Openly express their ideas

What if you are an ESFJ?

If you belong to the ESFJ personality type, then you must be like this –

You have a helping attitude and are sensitive to the requirements of others. There is a tendency to dedicate yourself actively to carrying out your responsibilities. You are always in tune with your emotional environment and focus on how others are feeling.

You would also give importance to the perceptions that others have of you. As an individual, you always seek cooperation and harmony. Moreover, there is an urge to meet others’ needs and make them happy.

Friends and family are a top priority for you. It comes from the value you give to tradition and loyalty. You show generosity regarding your effort, time, and emotions. 

You treat others’ problems as if they are your own. It is a motto to use your talents and make people’s lives better.

You would always look to receive appreciation from others for who you are and what they offer others. People can expect that you, as an ESFJ, will always take all your commitments seriously and meet them in the desired manner. 

There is a lot of practicality involved in the way you lead your life. Being responsible individuals, people can always count on you to take proper care of the daily activities and necessities. 

As you are always vibrant and gain popularity, you attract others and stay connected. People know you for being extremely good at managing finances. Other than this, you are traditional and remain focused on your family. 


20 telltale signs of ESFJ personality type

People of ESFJ personality type take care of others using practical means. They turn out to be the ones who guide people and help them meet their expectations. 

These individuals love spreading joy and positivity around them, hence making lives better for everyone. ESFJs enjoy being the center of attraction and leading others in the right direction.

Following are some of the signs and indications of ESFJ personality type:

1. Loves socializing

As ESFJs are extroverts, they love to have people around them, but there is a catch in this. These individuals do not enjoy just about anyone’s company. Only when they can have friendly and affirming atmospheres, their souls find true meaning and happiness. 

They enjoy taking part in interactions that promote harmony. An ESFJ is someone who always gives out positive vibes and wants their companions to do the same. 

For this personality type individual, sharing jokes and exchanging life stories with friends makes life worth living.

2. Keeps the home organized

An ESFJ personality type individual would always try to keep your home free from any kind of outside chaos and disorder. They always wish to make their homes comfortable. 

Thus, ESFJs tend to keep everything organized and decorate their homes. These people always ensure that they get hold of perfect quality furniture and paint walls with their favorite colors. 

All these things assure an ESFJ that there is purpose in this life. They also give these individuals the feeling that their activities will not go to waste. You find pleasure in creating a peaceful atmosphere at your home.

3. Ready to meet the needs of people

If you are an ESFJ, you have the natural urge to feel and meet the needs of people. When someone turns up at your place, you would be the first to notice if that person is feeling okay. 

They would check whether any individual needs something and make sure to fulfill their requirements. ESFJs are particular about taking care of minute details, which any other person would miss. 

Due to this nature, people always feel comfortable and at ease in the presence of an ESFJ personality type individual.

4. Enjoy recollecting their favorite moments

ESFJ personality type individuals occasionally remember fond memories involving their loved ones. It is one of their favorite pastimes, where they watch old videos and go through their popular family traditions.

They also recollect past moments that they loved. Bringing back those fond memories to life while carrying out conversations makes their whole atmosphere feel comfortable.

You enjoy these special moments so much that they act as a reminder of things that matter in life. Thus, they make life worth living. 

5. Loves to offer practical assistance

If an ESFJ sees that someone is facing problems, they would always offer their helping hand. These individuals believe in providing tangible help than offering words that can only console people.

Tangible help is what ESFJs always provide when they see people in distress. They do so either by giving them financial aid or by offering a meal.

An ESFJ personality type individual has a firm belief that giving someone practical help is an ideal way to show care.

6. Looks for a career that allows them to help others

ESFJs enjoy making careers in those fields where they can directly get in touch with people and let them meet their needs.

Therefore, these individuals are ideally suited to become instructors, doctors, or teachers as these career options give them enough opportunities to serve people. 

An ESFJ needs to have a career that allows them to make a meaningful impact on individuals. Otherwise, no matter what kind of work they do, it would make them feel uninspiring.

7. A deep sense of loyalty

ESFJs are loyal people who remain committed to their duties and ensure that they meet them in the desired manner. They are very reliable and stay dedicated to their loved ones. 

One can rely on an ESFJ to carry out their jobs responsibly. It does not matter, even if they have to spend their lives with certain qualities that are not so appealing. 

ESFJ Personality type people realize that no one is perfect. Hence, they always assure others of their companionship under all circumstances.

8. Values guide your life.

ESFJs always check with their conscience to understand if they are leading lives following their values and rules.

It is so because they often depend on their beliefs and rules to guide their lives appropriately. 

They focus on following their beliefs, along with those tried and tested books that offer proper guidance. All these give them ideas on how one can live well and make ideal choices.

9. Maintain a steady routine

ESFJ personality type people always focus on creating a highly dependable routine. It is an essential priority for them. It allows these individuals to think clearly and make them enjoy their lives even more.

They can enjoy their lives more, as these people know what to expect and what is on their scheme of things.

An ESFJ would not like to deal with unknown elements. They hate when they need to adjust their lives all of a sudden. 

10. Appreciate acknowledgment

When it comes to dealing with people they love, ESFJs are generous in their approach. At times, this generosity can make them feel as if others are taking them for granted.

It means a lot to them when people acknowledge their efforts or the service they offer. ESFJs get the energy to keep doing what they want to do.

11. They listen and advise

People usually keep themselves away from others’ problems, but it is not the case with ESFJ personality type individuals. They enjoy being someone on whom others can rely and share their feelings. 

ESFJs will always listen to all those people struggling in their lives. They would make sure to offer valuable advice on how they can come out of those problems.

This personality type individual would provide practical solutions to problems mixed with a touch of compassion.

12. Love to discuss their decisions with others

ESFJ personality type people always discuss their viewpoints with others and then go ahead to make decisions. They are wary of making decisions on their own.

Therefore, they seek others’ opinions and get proper advice to ensure their decisions make sense.

ESFJs do this to ensure that their decisions do not have any negative impact on any other individual.

13. Tend to worry about others a lot

ESFJs are always aware of the emotional struggles that people go through. Due to this reason, sometimes it can become a huge burden for them. 

When their loved ones are in emotional or physical pain, ESFJs find it extremely tough to relax. Under these circumstances, they need to realize that they are not responsible for others’ feelings.

They should also understand the need to take time out for fulfilling their needs and requirements.

14. Too many changes do not fascinate them

ESFJs do not like to change their set patterns in their lives. Even though they can enjoy an occasional trip to a place, still, they prefer going to those places where they have not been before.

These individuals enjoy where they have to undergo a familiar routine and stay in a neighborhood that is familiar to them. 

Shifting from a set pattern can be stressful for ESFJs, and hence, they must figure out those things that remain constant.

15. Sharp eye for details

An ESFJ personality type individual possesses a sharp eye for details. They are the first ones to see if any change has taken place somewhere. 

These people can naturally notice if something does not look the way it was before. It clearly shows that ESFJs are quick to take note when someone comes up with a different hairstyle or an individual has either put on weight or lost it.

An interesting thing in this regard is that, even though they notice, ESFJs will never say anything to anyone.

16. Embarrassment for others affects them

ESFJs experience embarrassment whenever they see someone is embarrassing themselves in front of the public. 

It happens because people of this personality type put themselves in others’ shoes, hence feeling their emotions. 

Therefore, they can sense how it would exactly feel when anyone is feeling embarrassed.

17. Stress makes you cynical

People of ESFJ personality type are usually quite open, but things change when they get under stress. In those situations, these individuals stay aloof from people and start analyzing stuff.

They even beat themselves up for having committed mistakes in the past that had put them on a different path altogether in their lives.

Stressful times make them cynical and critical of themselves, which they otherwise will not do.

18. You hate procrastinators

As an ESFJ, you always want certainty in everything you do or come across in your lifetime. Concrete decision that leads to proper closure or results is what you desire.

ESFJs hate when any decision is pending as it leads them to stress. You prefer knowing what is going to transpire.

Thus, procrastinators irritate you and make you feel edgy, as their work does not involve any surety.

19. Previous lessons act as your future guide

You are particular about keeping the lessons that you have learned in the past intact. As an ESFJ, you also use the tips that worked for you earlier and apply them in your present situations.

In case you have not tried a particular thing before, skepticism creeps in. ESFJs always try to follow their tried and tested methods as their guide. 

ESFJs do not prefer to experiment and find solutions to the problems they come across in their lives.

20. Keep track of reality

ESFJ personality type people always keep track of the reality of everything that happens around the world. They expect the same from others.

When people make decisions based on their theories, gut feelings, which have no place in reality, ESFJs become frustrated.

Even though you feel for others, you need to make realistic decisions with facts and evidence acting as backup.


Cognitive dynamics of ESFJ personality type (The Functional stacking)

Cognitive functions help determine how an individual’s overall functioning takes place. They also show the way a person’s thought processes work. In Myers Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), the basis of description and interpretation of the 16 personality types depends on these functions.

The hierarchy of these cognitive functions is based on their extent of strength. The most conscious one is the dominant function. Auxiliary, tertiary, and inferior functions follow it one after another. This typical arrangement of these functions in a particular order is known as functional stacking.

1. Dominant Function: Extraverted feeling (Fe)

  • ESFJs rely heavily on developing a harmonious relationship with the world.
  • They use their emotional connection to feel that they are part of something big.
  • These individuals can naturally know how people feel and understand emotional angles.
  • ESFJs are kind and support people in their tough times.
  • ESFJ personality type people are good at addressing conflicts and helping unite others.

2. Auxiliary Function: Introverted sensing (Si)

  • This function helps ESFJs to focus on the present rather than worry about the future.
  • People of this personality type are more interested in gathering specific information than abstract ones.
  • ESFJs pay close attention to details.
  • They give value to good conduct and know when to make changes.
  • These individuals gain from following a proper routine.
  • ESFJs can tackle discomfort and take it as a challenge to learn.

3. Tertiary Function: Extraverted Intuition (Ne)

  • The tertiary function enables ESFJs to connect with people and offer unique solutions to their problems.
  • People of this personality type are always looking to explore different possibilities when they see any particular situation.
  • These individuals can identify patterns. It allows them to understand people and their experiences better

4. Inferior Function: Introverted Thinking (Ti)

  • Inferior Function allows ESFJs to make a proper analysis of complex information.
  • When they try to make sense of theories, it can be their weak link.
  • ESFJ personality type people are very particular in leading their lives.
  • These people love making plans in advance.
  • Planning allows ESFJs to be in complete control of their life.

ESFJ VS ENFJ

Both these personality types people possess a lot of energy. Their perspectives and the kind of approaches they adapt in different situations are similar. 

Apart from the two mentioned above, several other similarities exist between these two personalities:

  • Both are extroverts.
  • The two personality types can easily connect with others and feel for them.
  • Both these personality types love to follow set plans.
  • They always tend to process their situations from emotional angles.
  • People of these personalities enjoy spending time with people.
  • They both care about meeting their partners’ needs.
  • People of ESFJ and ENFJ personality types make a long-term commitment in their relationships.

Despite having similarities, ESFJ and ENFJ personality’s people differ from one another. Let us look into the differences below:

ESFJENFJ
ESFJs thrive where there is stability. They feel uncomfortable when there are many changes and have to undergo unfamiliar experiences.ENFJs love it when there is a proper structure and plan in place. Still, they get bored when things become repetitive. The same kind of routine makes them feel as if there is a lack of inspiration. 
ESFJs love to see how realities and observations stack up with what they feel is right. They look for certainties and do not have time to dwell on something that involves uncertainty.ENFJs are always on the lookout for something unknown and complicated. They are quick to notice anything that one cannot prove or is not trustworthy.
ESFJ personality type people enjoy remembering old experiences and recollect some of their favorite moments vividly.ENFJs feel comfortable when they can visualize the time lying ahead of them and plan things accordingly to achieve their goals in the future.
ESFJs speak out by using literal language and describing things just the way they had experienced in detail. EENFJs, on the other hand, use loads of analogies and metaphors while speaking. They take the help of symbols to prove their point. These individuals initially focus on the bigger picture and then get into the finer points while they speak.
ESFJs are cautious when they look to consider a relationship. It is especially the case if they have had a history of being in troubled relationships. Therefore, they would observe their prospective partner and make them go through some tests to ensure that they are safe.ENFJ personality type individuals are a lot more eager to indulge themselves in new relationships. There will be much less caution in the way they approach any relationship. 
As far as friendships are concerned, ESFJs look for long-term ones with few changes taking place. They need to have a few friends who can reminisce about events of the past. They must come across stable situations where there is predictability and reliability.ENFJs have a lot of energy in them. They tend to get impatient if their friends fail to keep up with their pace. They have a fascination to discuss the future and make abstract plans with their friends. For long-term friendships, ENFJs look for people who are eager to explore the unknown.
ESFJs are action-oriented individuals having strong work ethics. They are ideally suited for careers that make them work within a framework. These people put a wholehearted effort into achieving the right kinds of results. Ideal career choices for these people would be Engineer, Mechanic, Doctor, Chef, etc.ENFJs opt for those careers, which enable them to make an impact in people’s lives. Therefore, the ideal career options for people of this personality type would be, Lawyer, Social Worker, Editor, Author, etc. 
ESFJ VS ENFJ

ESFJ compatibility

People of ESFJ personality are warm, loving, and give great importance to their relationships. They try to connect their happiness to others’ well-being. These individuals make tremendous commitments and quite often tend to neglect their benefits for the sake of others.

When others do well, ESFJs also thrive under those circumstances. Still, these personality types’ people require emotional attachment and seek affirmation from their partners. They do not like to indulge in any kind of negativity. An ESFJ always avoids conflict. 

If an ESFJ is in the midst of a conflict, it tends to upset them a lot. These people take criticism personally and treat cynical viewpoints as an insult to their whole existence. They can do anything to receive compliments from their partners.

For an ESFJ person, the ideal relationship is one where they would receive appreciation from their partner. Their better half should enjoy having good times, must love to meet people, and forge long-term relationships. It is a necessity to make ESFJs satisfied and happy. 

Let us now see the essential aspects that ESFJs must consider while seeking potential partners who can help develop healthy relationships with these Consuls:

  • ESFJs can enter into healthy, loving, long-term relationships with those who consistently admire and express their appreciation.
  • People who would be comfortable in attending social gatherings with ESFJs.
  • People who will encourage taking care of themselves.
  • All those who will help ESFJs, and lead their lives comfortably. 
  • People, who will be gentle and not criticize ESFJs. 
  • The following compatibility chart gives a clear picture of the best, good and worst matches for people of ESFJ personality type.
Ideal matchGood matchPoor matchPoles apart
ISFPISTP
ESFJ
ISFJ
ISTJ
ENTJ
ESTP
ESTJ
ESFP
INFP
INTP
INFJ
ENFP
ENFJ
ENTP
INTJ
ESFJ compatibility chart

ESFJ relationships

So far, we have discussed several aspects of the ESFJ personality type including, their personality traits, signs, and cognitive functions. Now, it is the right time to see how people of this personality type deal with different kinds of relationships:

Romantic partner/spouse

ESFJs are very passionate about the long-term relationship that they maintain as a partner or spouse. They are warm, loyal, and put all their energy and efforts into fulfilling their partners’ needs. Consuls do this even if it means they have to neglect their requirements and make their partners happy.

ESFJ needs to have social validation. They need to have a sense of belonging. No other relationship gives these individuals the kind of support, dedication, and stability that they get from the strong bond of a romantic relationship.

ESFJ personality type people take each stage of their relationship seriously. Right from dating to gradual growth in a relationship, it should satisfy the needs of one another. It starts from creating the initial level of understanding. Gradually, it should help develop mutual respect and finally meet their goals. 

An ESFJ must know that their partner loves and appreciates them. It tends to have a massive effect on their self-esteem and mood. If they feel that their partner’s support is not there and there is criticism, it can hurt the Consuls badly. 

People of this personality type do not like criticism and conflict. So, it can be a great challenge for them to resolve problems. Surprisingly, once an ESFJ has the backing of their partner, they can remain tough even during times of hardship.

The less mature Consuls might not possess the inner zeal and wisdom to attract their partners’ backing. They could become quite needy. ESFJs might not hesitate to compromise their values and principles to get approval from partners in return. 

This approach is not only unattractive but can also make a relationship emotionally abusive. The behavioral pattern can further lower their self-esteem. Another drawback is an ESFJ’s attempt to fix their social status and seek approval.

ESFJ as parent

ESFJ parents display their affection, warmth, and dedication in typical ways that have a positive impact. They are sensitive yet possess the firmness to establish rules and regulations. ESFJs use their support and compassion to take care of everything. It happens in case there is any difference of opinion.

Right from the beginning, ESFJs make sure that their children are happy and safe. ESFJs feel pleased for the support they can give to their dependent children. As they grow, the Consuls’ care and affection also grow along with them. 

These individuals want their children to remain physically safe. They also make it a point to ensure their safety on the social front. ESFJs organize camps and several other activities so that children can remain socially active. 

Usually, Consul Personality type people give great value to stability and harmony. Therefore, they try to impose indirect pressure to teach life lessons to their kids. When a child does something wrong, ESFJ parents take a firm stand and expect their children to respect their viewpoints.

As time passes and children make their transition into adolescence, they can start pushing themselves away from their parents. 

Rather than accepting the change, ESFJ parents tend to take this personally. These individuals feel as if they are losing grip over their children.

Therefore, they try to extend their dependence as much as possible. In this respect, one must remember that when children grow up and leave home, it shows their parent’s success. 

They were successful in preparing their children to face challenges in their lives. It should make ESFJs proud.

The sensitivity and warmth with which ESFJ parents raise their children always make them appreciate their parents’ efforts. 

ESFJs children will also realize that, with time, they will also have their children. Then, those kids will have the benefit of unconditional care and love from their grandparents.

ESFJ as friends

ESFJ personality type people are socially active, and hence, they look to have big friends’ circles. These people love spending the quality time and energy required for maintaining relationships with their friends. 

Due to their loyal nature, ESFJs always offer support to their friends. They can do anything to make their friends happy. People of this personality type gain popularity as they can adjust to any environment.

Consuls enjoy this dynamism. They expect that their friends will support and reciprocate the efforts accordingly. Nothing hurts them more than knowing that their trusted friends criticize their beliefs. 

The main drawback of ESFJ personality type people is that they believe their friends cannot do anything wrong. They always come forward to defend their deeds irrespective of circumstances and expect the same courtesy in return.

ESFJs are good at expanding their friends’ circle if they can accept others’ views without being judgmental and drawing conclusions as per their beliefs. 

Consuls must avoid making judgments based on others’ viewpoints, thus letting them understand people better.

ESFJs, as friends, can make great use of their sensitivity to remain connected with the motivations and driving forces of their friends. 

They make full use of their powers for the greater good. That allows them to encourage and inspire other individuals.

As a whole, ESFJ friends are sincere in maintaining their relationships. Their zeal, enthusiasm, and social intelligence help them win over numerous friends and acquaintances. 

Moreover, the support and dedication that these individuals offer help keep the bond of friendships strong.


ESFJ in workplace

When it comes to discussing your workplace habits, one thing that comes to the spotlight is your ability to organize people and processes in the right manner to accomplish team goals. 

You are the one who will use your warmth, guidance, and social harmony to manage people and motivate them to do what needs to be done.

Being an outgoing person and possessing excellent peoples skills, you will always win over challenging tasks. People with consul personalities are good at establishing authority. This makes them good leaders as well.

ESFJs have excellent interpersonal skills. Thus they know how to use human resources in the right way. For this, they create a supportive and warm workplace structure where teammates are psychologically safe to express their talents freely and delegate the assigned tasks appropriately.

ESFJs prefer to work with others in close collaboration. They thrive in motivated and active teams where members share their opinions and views clearly, and delegates work conscientiously.

People with ESFJ personalities always follow rules diligently. They prefer to respect authority and remain comfortable in any work role in the organizational hierarchy.

As colleagues

As colleagues, ESFJs are friendly and optimistic. They are helpful and remain sensitive to the needs of their co-workers. 

These individuals believe in teamwork. Consul personalities may feel stuck and confined if asked to do anything on their own. They prefer to take assistance from their colleagues at all times.

ESFJs have excellent networking skills. Their warm, humble, and helpful nature makes them very popular people amongst co-workers. 

Being a good colleagues they will always put their needs aside and sacrifice things for the well-being of their team members. ESFJs maintain good connections with their colleagues for a long time. 

As colleagues, ESFJs also offer practical solutions to problems that may occur while working together over some team issues. 

Moreover, they avoid conflicts at all costs and prefer to build a harmonious relationship with everyone in the team.

As subordinates

As subordinate staff in an office, ESFJs can delegate their task quite effortlessly. They can build up a well-structured work set up and can go on doing the same tasks every day.

They never get bored or tired of monotonous work, and never complain about anything in the workplace. These individuals are great fans of structure, planning, and order. 

Their well-organized nature helps them to do things perfectly, often with no or minimal mistakes. As subordinates, they are hardworking and their managers like them a lot. ESFJs can be easily relied upon and trusted. 

As far as their job is concerned, they are usually the no-nonsense type who knows how to accomplish their work on time and get rewarded in the form of praise and appreciation from their immediate boss.

These individuals are patient and peaceful. They show respect to the authority they work for. Since they are a little conventional, they may not always prefer innovation. Rather they like to do things in the same way it has been done for such a long time.

ESFJs are comfortable in workplaces that provide them an opportunity to remain safe, secure, and stable for a long time without many major changes happening around them.

As managers

ESFJ managers love organization, structure, and planning. They do not like to see work done haphazardly. Their humble and soft side allows them to develop a harmonious relationship with their junior teammates. 

Moreover, being an extrovert, consul personalities have good people management skills. They are efficient leaders who can inspire and motivate teammates to work at their best. 

People with this personality type always remain aware of their social status and designation. As such they never get into conflicts and squabbling with others in the office. They always prefer to maintain peace and harmony in the setup.

Since these people can manage others well, they become efficient team leaders. They can really motivate others to follow their lead. ESFJs can unite and involve everyone quite efficiently in accomplishing team tasks. 

ESFJs are friendly and enjoyable managers. Sometimes they may go out of their way to help and guide team members who need their support. These individuals can come down from their level an inch and be with them emotionally in trying times. That’s great! Right?


ESFJ and career choices

As an ESFJ, you will always prefer traditional and conventional jobs that are systematic and organized. You are not much bothered about work innovation and creativity.

Though your skills and expertise are limitless, yet you will not look for adventurous or novel career opportunities. You are the one who will adjust very well with a 9 to 5 job, without complaints and regrets.

ESFJs remain focused on their tasks. Their purpose in a job is to make things done in a systematic way. You may not follow diverse career roles but you will always remain dutiful, committed, and dedicated to your work and career.

People with this personality type prefer careers where they can naturally remain helpful towards others. Thus, an administrator or manager role is usually an ideal fit for these people. 

Truly logical and analytical jobs do not fit the ESFJ mindset because emotional feedback and human interaction are important facets of their work habits.

These individuals are productive and do justice to the job and career they choose and work in. some of their preferred career choices are:

  • Corporate trainer
  • Doctor
  •  Optometrist
  • Special educator
  • Psychologist
  • Nurse
  • Dietician
  • Real estate agent
  • Advertisement professional
  • Sales representative
  • Receptionist
  • Corporate trainer
  • Event manager
  • Social worker
  • Technical writer
  • Customer service representative

ESFJ – strengths

We all possess certain distinct qualities that act as areas of proficiency, knowledge, and skills. These areas of expertise help us to sustain life in a better way. In positive psychology “personal strengths are defined as our built-in capacities for particular ways of thinking, feeling, and behaving (Linley, 2008)

Some of the notable strengths that ESFJ personalities possess are:

1. Practical and realistic

ESFJs possess great practical skills and know-how. Due to their organized and planned way of doing things, they know the right ways of accomplishing tasks and in the right manner. These individuals can manage routine tasks quite proficiently.

2. Dutiful and dedicated towards their work

Your sense of duty is just incredible. Being a responsible person, you will delegate your duties on time and with utmost dedication. In most situations, you will not allow others to complain or find faults in your tasks. 

3. Faithful

ESFJs are faithful people. Your loyalty and trustworthiness make you genuine life partners and dependable employees. 

You love stable and secure things, thereby preferring the status quo. Your love for traditionalism and conventions allows you to remain focused on tasks that need to be done rather than only thinking about them.

Being an action-oriented person, you’ll strive to fulfill your obligations, no matter whatever problems may come in the way. 

You are a reliable person and can become the pillar of any social structure that you may belong to.

4. You’re sensitive and generous

ESFJ personality types are kind and warm-hearted. They are the first ones to notice people’s feelings. These people never like to offend, hurt, or insult anyone. They are the givers and prefer to be with others in times of need. 

Being emotionally sensitive, ESFJs can understand the deepest feelings and agonies of others. They deeply care for the needs of others and that’s why they are great community builders where every human will live in peace and harmony.

5. Excellent networking skills

ESFJs have super networking skills. They know how to interact with others proficiently. Being an extrovert, this is quite easy for them. They have the ability to mingle with just anyone. Thus, they are always accepted and well-liked by others in the community.

6. You will stand up for your rights and beliefs

ESFJs are bold and assertive. You will always follow your heart and stand up for what you believe to be right. 

You will always remain in the spotlight when it comes to social activities such as volunteering, fund-raising, putting up flyers to support a social cause. 

Being an active person, you never sit back and wait for someone else to take action. You’ll do it in your own nice ways.


ESFJ – shortcomings

A personality weakness is the area of deficit that needs to be improved to live a happy and healthy life. The knowledge base or character traits that fall short of the expected mark can have a negative impact on the person’s overall functioning. 

ESFJs also have some weak areas that need to be improved over time and they are as follows:

1. Too much concerned about social status

ESFJs are too bothered about social status and recognition. It affects their decision-making process. Sometimes it makes them inflexible and limits their creativity and novel thinking. 

Sometimes, ESFJs may behave like people pleasers. They can go to any extent to get a social appreciation for their good deeds and help offered towards the community.

2. Inflexible and reluctant to change

You will always follow the traditional rules and conventions of society without saying a word. This makes you an inflexible and rigid person. 

ESFJs place importance on what’s prevalent in society. They never like change that may challenge the status quo.

Being unable to think beyond the mainstream, they never think about creating and innovating ideas and processes. They prefer to continue doing the same things for a long time.

3. Breaks down during criticism

ESFJs are sensitive and cannot take criticism as a normal part of their life. They may break down and become defensive. Usually, these people resort to angry outbursts or may hurt others by saying harsh words, if others criticize them for their way of living, habits, beliefs, and values.

4. ESFJs are too selfless

You’re too selfless at times. This nature may be taken for granted by many people living with you on a daily basis. They may consider you timid and weak.  In this way, you may lose yourself and forget about your own needs and desires.

5. Needy for approval

ESFJs always want appreciation and praise from others. They also have a strong desire to get noticed in social circles for their helpful and kind acts. 

This behavior simply means that they always crave attention from others otherwise their self-worth feels inadequate and weak. 

If anyone rejects their good deeds and does not appreciate them publicly, they may take this personally and will feel inadequate and vulnerable from the inside.

6. Poor creative thinkers

ESFJs are poor creative thinkers. Neither do they believe in creation nor in innovation? These people cannot imagine and visualize long-term goals. 

They are not good at seeing the big picture, and can only see the patterns that were in use in society for a long time. They get stuck in conventional ideas that have outgrown their usage in present-day developed worlds.


How to relate with ESFJ personality (dating tips for you)

ESFJs like people who are emotionally expressive, helpful, and caring. They prefer to relate well with those who are socially sensitive and generous. 

These people possess strong values and they are actually serious about their present and future relationships goals. Being a helping person, they will go out of their comfort zone to help their partners and would expect the same from them.

If you are dating an ESFJ, you must be eager to know about the mannerisms that you need to exhibit to remain close to their hearts. 

Here we go with some of them:

  • You need to be clear about your needs, expectations, and goals related to the relationship. ESTPs like organized thinking and action processes. They would hate to be caught off-guard with unexpected stuff that they never expected.
  • ESFJs look for long term relationships. They are not the ones who prefer temporary bonding and one night stands.
  • They look for sensitive and kind people who are altruistic, faithful, committed, and lovable. Moreover they would love to have shared interests with their partners.
  • You need to be attentive and listen well to what they wish to tell you. This makes them feel at ease in the relationship because they feel loved and accepted.
  • If you wish to be in their good books, invest time in helping others who are in need. They relate with people who show interest in community outreach programs.
  • ESFJs prefer people who give due respect to time. They hate procrastination and don’t like people with poor time management skills.
  • These individuals are traditional and you will have to respect and praise the culture and traditional stuff that they may follow.
  • ESFJs are sober and modest. Thus they prefer partners who have social etiquette and display good manners when and where necessary.
  • Never break your promise if you are already dating an ESFJ, as they dislike people who fail to keep their word.
  • You need to be really good at expressing your innermost feelings for them.
  • ESFJs are genuinely interested in romance that involves physical intimacy and closure. They look for some genuine warmth where mind and body can find the ultimate love.

Famous ESFJs you may be knowing

If you are an ESFJ personality type, you would be eager to know the names of some of the celebrity people who may share this personality type. These people are renowned public figures who have made their mark in society. 

Known for their hard work and dignified living, these people were acclaimed and respected worldwide by people like you and me. Some of the well-known ESFJs are as follows:


What do ESFJs hate?

There is something or the other that all personality types would try to avoid at all costs. It is because they just cannot take it any further or hates to accept it as a part of their daily living. 

  • ESFJs hate being selfish. They always have open hands to lend their support to others.
  • People with this personality type cannot see their loved ones unhappy or suffering due to some reason.
  • They hate social discrimination.
  • ESFJs hate taking sides especially for those they equally care about.
  • These individuals hate unexpected changes and surprises.
  • ESFJs also hate being put in a spot where they know that they would not perform well.
  • They don’t like people who try to deceive others to meet their unscrupulous intentions.
  • These individuals may get frustrated if others try to take advantage of their helping behaviour.
  • They may get annoyed by unkind behaviour or lack of empathy shown by others in various social situations.
  • ESFJs never like people telling them what they need to do. They prefer being independent in their thoughts and actions.
  • If anyone tries to conflict with their values or what they believe to be right, they may not like it.
  • They hate being talked about in social setups.
  • ESFJs hate being criticized by others.
  • As these individuals are methodical and conventional by nature, they hate those who forgets their commitments, such as forgetting a vital meet-up, showing up late for a party, etc.
  • They hate people who break promises and feel it is easy-going and say a simple ‘sorry’ to save their face.
  • Since they strictly adhere to rules, they hate people who disrespects rules and regulations quite frequently.
  • ESFJs are focused and goal-oriented. They do not like putting things off for some other time. Even lack of organization and procrastination without any genuine reason irks them badly.
  • When people do not care about what an ESFJ is saying or doing, they may not like it. It would irritate them fiercely.

Popular hobbies of ESFJ personality type

Finding the right hobby for oneself can be a tricky thing for most personality types because it should match with the individual’s preferences, lifestyle choices, interests, and areas of strength.

ESFJs should choose hobbies that can give them some opportunity to connect with themselves rather than spending time with others. Some of the side-hustles that they frequently engage in are:

  • Bicycle riding for longer distances
  • Pottery
  • Cooking
  • Voluntary service
  • Playing outdoor sports
  • Photography
  • Wine tasting
  • Bee keeping
  • Mentoring 
  • Dancing in social events
  • Camping
  • Bowling
  • Playing golf
  • TV anchor

ESFJ and Myers Briggs personality test

Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) is a self-report personality test that is used to determine the 16 personality types described after the extensive work of Isabel Myers and her mother Katharine Briggs in the 1940s.

This Myers-Briggs personality test gives the description of all the 16 personalities in detail. This personality inventory is based on the work of famous Swiss psychiatrist Carl Jung.

The test consists of nearly 100 items that have two statements. The person has to choose any one of the statements that best describes him /her.

Since there is no right or wrong answer in the test, the test just analyses the person’s way of thinking, emotional expressions, and the way the person responds or reacts to the world around them.

The theoretical premise on which MBTI describes people is based on four different categories. These four categories were first identified by Carl Jung and later extensively researched by the Myers-Briggs duo. The four categories are:

Thus, one letter taken from each category is used to give the four-letter personality type of the person; such as ENTJ, ISFJ, and INFP, INTJ, ESTP, etc. 

This judgment of a particular personality category is done through functional stacking of the various cognitive functions possessed by the individual. 

If you are keen to know your personality type, you can take the original MBTI personality test here.


How rare is the ESFJ personality type?

ESFJs are the second most common personality type in the U.S. they comprise about 12% of the population. Men are 8% and women are 17% in the national sample.

ESFJs are not rare personality types. They are more commonly found among women than men. Usually, these warm-hearted people become the center of attraction in the communities they live in. 

Being a highly practical and pragmatic personality type, they always believe in doing things in an organized way and bringing positive changes in their immediate surroundings.


ESFJ personalities – major stress triggers

Sometimes you may feel overwhelmed due to many reasons and may feel out of control. This condition symbolizes a state of stress when major important cognitive functions are failing and making you psychologically restless and anxious.

There are a few real-life scenarios that can make ESFJs really stressful and irritable.

1. Disorderly environments

ESFJs prefer ordered and structured environments. They may get anxious if they are expected to perform suddenly or told to do something that they aren’t expecting. 

These individuals cannot take surprises easily. They may fail in the task given and feel uncomfortable and anxious. The disorganized and spontaneous work environments make them feel uneasy and nervous.

2. Conflict and fights

ESFJs love peace and harmony around them. If they are put in a situation of fights and squabbling, laden with conflicts and disagreements, these individuals may feel emotionally overwhelmed and anxious. Sometimes they may exhaust themselves trying to bring back the lost peace in the situation.

3. Unexpected changes

People with ESFJ personality types dislike change, they want a perfect plan to be made much ahead before the thing is to be executed in reality. 

Thus, any sudden and unexpected changes that they were not anticipating can be a source of extreme stress for them. 

They would just hate to face such a situation. If they do not know what the future has in store for them, they would feel upset and fidgety.

4. Less time to accomplish a task

ESFJs may feel stressed out if they are asked to rush with something that they want to do slowly and steadily. 

As they cannot do things hurriedly, they will always start doing things much earlier than the deadline so that they can avoid the last-minute rush. 

ESFJs are highly systematic as far as their work is concerned. They hate to make mistakes and thus avoid being under pressure to do things fast.

5. Loss of values

They may not like giving away their innate values for someone or something. ESFJs are value-oriented people who always believe in doing the right thing. These individuals would feel anxious and agitated if asked to abandon their values in some way. Rather, they will always stand up for what they think is right.

6. Mistrusting someone

People with ESFJ personalities believe in the innate goodness of human beings. They do not want to mistrust the people who matter the most in their lives. However, if they think that they cannot count on someone or trust them blindly, ESFJs may feel bad about it. This can eventually become a source of stress for them.

How do they cope with stress?

Some of the stress-busting tips that may work well for ESFJs are:

  • Avoiding the heated situation for the time being can help ESFJs to deal well with stress. Sometimes moving away from stress triggers allows them to formulate fresh perspectives about the situation. In this way, the charged up emotions and mental suffering will slowly subside.
  • Talking to a good friend or a close confidant may help them to overcome the stress.
  • They can take a nature walk or do some meditation to feel poised from within.
  • Use of humor and laughter can help alleviate stress.
  • Some light-hearted movies, soothing music, chit-chats with friends may also help.
  • Journaling one’s feelings is a great way to relieve stress. ESFJs can try out this method to identify their stress triggers and note down how they felt about the situation.
  • Scientific studies have shown that spending time with pets may reduce stress and fill up the air in the room with laughter and positivity. ESFJs can use this coping mechanism, if they have pets in the house. 

The video link shared below shows the signs of ESFJ personalities. Do check out.


Key takeaway from ‘ThePleasantPersonality’

To end the discussion, it can be said that ESFJs are best when it comes to caring for and helping people in need. These individuals are selfless, practical, and can create and nurture a balanced and harmonious environment for themselves and others.

Their invaluable practical approach towards life, well-tuned with method, structure, and planning is just invaluable. ESFJs are an asset to any social community forum that focuses on the overall growth of people in general.

They are guided by emotions and not by intuitions, typically get bored with abstract ideas, logic, and analysis. Rather they prefer straight talk that comes directly from someone’s heart. ESFJs don’t understand the double meaning. Thus, they avoid it at all costs. 

ESFJs believe that the happiest moments of life are once-in-a-lifetime opportunities. It may not always come, so whenever you have it, just grab it and live life to the fullest. 

For them, a customary thanksgiving party or a Christmas get-together with loved ones would be more worthy and valuable than anything else in this world.

“Don’t ever doubt yourselves or waste a second of your life. It’s too short and you’re too special.”

Ariana Grande

Article Sources


1. https://www.truity.com/personality-type/ESFJ
2. https://www.crystalknows.com/personality-type/esfj
3. https://www.psychologyjunkie.com/2021/02/03/10-signs-of-an-unhealthy-esfj/
4. https://www.personalitypage.com/html/ESFJ.html